Movie #748: Anatomy of a Murder

Anatomy of a Murder is a courtroom drama/comedy starring Jimmy Stewart Lee Remick, Al O'Connell, Ben Gazzara, Eve Arden, Kathryn Grant, George C. Scott, and Joseph Welch.

Attorney and former prosecutor Paul Biegler (Stewart) is in semi-retirement, drinking with his former colleague McCarthy (O'Connell), when he gets recommended for a case defending a man named Manion (Gazzara). Manion shot and killed a bartender who, allegedly, raped his wife Laura (Remick). Biegler takes the case after subtly suggesting that Manion rely on an insanity defense, and then finds an 1886 precedent that seems to support it.

The movie spends most of the time with Biegler looking for evidence to support his case, watching Laura flirt with him (and others), and lots of Duke Ellington playing. In the end, Manion is acquitted due to "irresistible impulse", but the defense raises the possibility that Laura and the victim were, in fact, having an affair and Manion caught them. A critical piece of information shows up dramatically - planted? Probably not, but the possibility is there, and Anatomy of a Murder doesn't give us the easy out of explaining the truth. 

The movie has some interesting history; it's based on a book which was in turn based on a real case. The defendant really did lean on irresistible impulse, and really did get let off. But it's an interesting film in a lot of other ways. Joseph Welch plays Judge Weaver, and Welch was, of course, counsel for the US Army during the McCarthy hearings (he famously asked McCarthy "Have you no decency, sir?"). It's also kind of fun watching this movie now, when there's a very exciting trial (rather, several) ready to kick off and we can look forward to courtroom theatrics. 

James Stewart goes from laid-back country lawyer to firebrand in court, but what I like is that the movie never lets you forget it's mostly an act. Sure, he's representing his client zealously, but there's nothing hanging on it for him personally other than the fee and the thrill. And at the end, when he gets stiffed on the bill, the case acts as motivation for him rather than being a big Primal Fear "holy shit" moment.

The movie has a lot of strong language for the time, and yet it's very weird to see a woman talking cavalierly about being raped (just in terms of how those scenes would play in a movie made today). The characters in the movie feel like people, and people are messy, and conveying that messiness is, even today, something movies have trouble with. Easy to see why Anatomy of a Murder got all the Oscar noms it did. 

My Grade: A
Rewatch Value: Medium

Next up: Child's Play

Wicked Ones: Why'd It Have to be Snakes?

Tonight was Wicked Ones, after something of a hiatus due to scheduling higgledy-piggledy. Here's last time.

In the weeks following the Rampage in Charter Hollow (in which both Yog-en-Yeg and Thudd were killed), the Sepulcher of Suffering has grown considerably. There's a veritable village cropping up around the chasm leading to the dungeon, with Dark aligned folks coming to worship the Dark Three. And a new Wicked One has joined them - 'Ashe'irashe, a snake-person from the jungles to the west, was out here visiting with his friend Drastiel (an elf-lich), heard about the Sepulcher, and moved into Yog-en-Yeg's old room. 

Good thing, too! One fine day, six delvers - three hirelings and three adventurers - come calling. The hirelings are your general leather-armor-clad goons, but the adventurers, well. One is a Paladin of Istalpitca, the God of Wealth. One is the gnome artificer that the Wicked Ones fought way back here. And the third is a mysterious, dark wanderer wearing a grey hood. 

The six of them slip through the village, using the information that Yog-en-Yeg blabbed back in Charter Hollow to avoid guards and notice. They bribe a bugbear to tell them about the spike trap before the entrance hall, and dodge it nicely. They walk into the Sepulcher and near the crevasse, and Mr. Tentacles, the shadowy monster from below, lurches up! He grabs one of the hirelings and drags him into the dark (CRONCH), and then goes back for seconds, but the gnome tosses a light bomb into the crevasse and it discorporates the shadow-squid (he'll be fine). 

The adventures proceed into the hall; the grey wanderer glances at the box in the alcove and says "mimic." They ignore it, and head to a door on the far wall. They enter and pass through the magical hallway meant to instill fear, and into the scriptorium. 

The scriptorium, unfortunately, also contains the staircase leading to the sanctum. With no minions to intercept them and no other obstacles in their way, the five remaining adventurers descend. 

The Wicked Ones are in their rooms; Baldruf is sharpening a blade, while 'Ashe is arranging his skulls and potions. The delvers enter the room and stay tight, and Baldruf sneaks out, trying to stay hidden. 'Ashe casts an illusion and two bugbears appear from behind pillars and charge the delvers. One of the hirelings rushes in to engage, and the other tries but the paladin stops him. Fnort charges out to engage and bonks the hireling with his flail, but the paladin tosses a handful of coin on the floor and Fnort has to forcibly tear his attention away. 

But Fnort has a trick of his own - earlier, when the adventurers were in the entrance hall ("Mimic"), Fnort was hiding up there, watching them. He knows that the paladin is going to prevent this hireling from charging stupidly into danger and fakes out the paladin by striking at the hireling. When the paladin goes to intercept, Fnort strikes! The blow doesn't land as hard as he'd like, but the paladin is definitely bruised.

Meanwhile, Baldruf strikes at the artificer from behind! The artificer hears him, though, and tosses back a couple of metal devices. They nearly catch Baldruf's wrists and pin him to the wall, but Baldruf dodges and vanishes into the shadows, rethinking his approach. 

'Ashe, too, has prepared a bit - there are multiple potions labeled "DO NOT OPEN" on his shelf. He grabs a few, mixes them, and tosses the bottle into the room. It explodes into big, billowy, marshmallowy smoke, obscuring the Wicked Ones from their enemies. Baldruf calls upon Zaheen - not normally the god he'd pray to - for help, and Zaheen answers. The paladin and the wanderer lash out at noises in the smoke, and both of the remaining hirelings fall dead. 

The Wicked Ones press the attack, and Baldruf remembers he recruited a skeleton and put it in Thudd's old closet. He releases the skeleton and it snaps off its own arm to use as a club, charges up to the artificer, and whacks him across the head. The gnome gives a cry for help, and the paladin gives the skeleton a handful of gems and says, in Dark tongue, "I'll double your pay!" The skeleton obligingly charges after Baldruf, and the orc, a bit surprised by this, dodges into the shadows again. The skeleton follows, and Baldruf dodges at the last minute and the skeleton crashes into the paladin. They manage to extricate themselves, but that just leaves the paladin open.

Fnort goes all-out and charges at the paladin, mushing him into a pillar. 'Ashe slithers up and stabs him, absorbing his soul into his ritual knife. The jewels that the skeleton was carrying disintegrate, and he gives a shit-eating grin to Baldruf.

The gnome tosses a pair of metal orbs into the midst of the Wicked Ones, and they explode into wires. Fnort flings his grapple and rope and tangles them up, while Baldruf simply moves out of range. 'Ashe stares the wanderer down and tries to freeze him with his snake-like gaze, but while the wanderer does lock eyes, he remains in control of him self. The wanderer draws a knife and makes for 'Ashe, and the skeleton tries to get in his way, but the wanderer easily dispatches him.

Fnort leaps on the wanderer and starts punching, and 'Ashe tries to slip in and stab him. The wanderer throws Fnort at 'Ashe and follows up with a barrage of crossbow bolts. Fnort blocks and catches the bolts in his armor, but then is overcome by the feeling that they're failing Zaheen and that he needs to inject some more chaos. He runs around smashing the pillars, and a big chunk of ceiling falls in.

'Ashe tries to talk the wanderer into joining them - after all, most of them are dead and he's outnumbered! The wanderer isn't having it, though, and fires a crossbow bolt at each of them. Baldruf and 'Ashe both dodge, but Fnort is still smashing things and takes the bolt in the back. Turning, he sees the artificer, wounded and confused. He rushes over and relentlessly beats him with his flail. The gnome tosses every remaining doodad he has, but all it does is destroy Fnort's armor.

Baldruf, hidden again, scatters some caltrops around the wanderer. 'Ashe sees this and casts a spell, putting the soul of the paladin into it - very simple, the wanderer just punches himself in the face and knocks himself backwards into the caltrops. He trips himself up, and Baldruf appears behind him, stabbing him in the heart. "Where...did you come from?" he croaks.

The Wicked Ones breathe a sign of relief. They definitely need to retouch their dungeon layout a bit. They decide that they will take on something easier next. Their plan is to eventually take over Iron Reef and Bartertown, thus consolidate power in the Northern Flats, but first they decide to hold some Olympic-like games for the goblins of Breaker's Bridge! 

Next time: Chicken chasing!

Character Creation: With Great Power Master Edition

More superheroes? Yes please!

The Game: With Great Power (Master Edition)
The Publisher: Incarnadine Press (their site seems to be down)
Degree of Familiarity: None with this edition, but I've run the previous one
Books Required: Just the one

What is it with game companies just letting their websites go fallow? At least when Growling Door folded we had the good grace to a) publicly say we were shutting down and b) shutter the site. Anyway, enough of that.

With Great Power is a superhero game, but it's got a special place in my heart. Many years ago, I had a really, really good year at Origins. I played both With Great Power and Burning Empires, both of which were kind of eye-opening in how they treated narrative responsibility and game mechanics. I have since run With Great Power a couple of times; it's not my favorite supers RPG because the mechanics are weird and it's kind of labor-intensive, but I always enjoyed it. 

This edition...I dunno. The mechanics are definitely streamlined, it would be much less laborious to run, and it wouldn't require multiple decks of cards, true. But it's just boring to read. There's no example of play, which was one of the highlights of the first edition. And after reading it, I don't get any good sense of how it would work at the table (in fairness, the previous edition wasn't really great about that either, but that's why the example of play helped). 

Anyway, let's do some super-heroing. 

So, first thing, I draw five Origin cards and answer the questions on three of them. I wish I had a PDF of the book and/or the card deck; I think I bought this at Metatopia or something. Anyway, the questions I have to choose from are:

• You have to be careful about pushing your powers too far. What do you fear could happen?
• Your powers have a mind of their own - literally. What does it want? What sort of understanding have you reached with it?
• Your powers cause a dangerous side effect. What is it? How do you keep it in check?
• You are on a crowded subway train. Someone on this train is plotting to harm a lot of people. How do your powers allow you to discover their plans?
• You cannot shoulder the burden of your powers without help. Who is your support? What do you offer them?

Well, definitely some nice complementary choices there. I believe I shall take numbers 2,3, and 5. So here's what I'm thinking. 

My hero's name is Connor Cordette. Connor is a bouncer/doorman at a popular nightclub in Wherever This Game is Set. That means he works late hours, and often winds up walking home very late at night. One night (morning), walking past an alley, he heard something crying. He actually wasn't sure if it was animal or human, but was concerned, so he walked in to look. Something leaped on his face and melted over his body, slithering into his clothes and spreading over his skin. (Yes, there's some similarity to Venom here, I acknowledge that.)

Since then, Connor has developed extraordinary abilities...but there are some downsides, too.

Your powers have a mind of their own - literally. What does it want? What sort of understanding have you reached with it? 

The alien skin-slime can communicate with Connor in a very general, broad way. He knows if it's scared, hurt, in pain, or happy, but it doesn't have language the way we understand it. Connor still doesn't know where it's from or what it really wants. He knows that so far all it wants is to remain on him, and to absorb nutrients. Connor's not sure, but he feels like it's getting smarter. 

Your powers cause a dangerous side effect. What is it? How do you keep it in check?

The skin-slime needs food, and it's perfectly capable of just absorbing nutrients from organic, live matter that it touches. Connor found that out the hard way when he went to work the night after the skin-slime landed on him, he touched someone's hand and nearly killed him as the skin-slime started siphoning off the poor guy. To the untrained eye it looked like he just passed out, and fortunately Connor reined it in, but he has to be very careful what (and who) he touches. He can shift the skin-slime away from his hands if he's going to, say, pet a dog, but it's a conscious effort and he hasn't quite been able to convey to the slime that just sucking all the sodium out of a living thing is not acceptable. 

You cannot shoulder the burden of your powers without help. Who is your support? What do you offer them?

Connor's neighbor Jackie used to be a doctor, but got caught selling prescriptions and lost her license. She does medical consults for folks in the neighborhood (off the books, obviously), and Connor confided in her. Jackie acts as confidante to Connor and is trying to help figure this thing out, but she's not a researcher and she's out of her depth. She has discovered, however, that if she takes a small sample (quarter teaspoon at most) of the skin-slime, dilutes it in a saline solution for a while and then drips it into her eyes, it gives her euphoria and energy. She's looking to figure out why, but she's also become an addict. Connor doesn't know about this yet.

And now, we just...pick a few "things" about the character. Man, this got really loosey-goosey. 

OK, well, we know that Connor is a bouncer/doorman. Let's say he's more the latter than the former, which means he's connected to the party and drug scene. He's not necessarily against people doing drugs and having fun, but he's very against the violence and so on that goes with the criminal industry. As a super-hero, then, he's trying to end the war on drugs and he has no time for violent cops. 

And how about his powers? The skin-slime can alter his face, skin, or voice. It can also increase his strength and speed, and it can read the particles in the air to track or identify others. I think that manifests as Connor being able to see scents; the slime can't convey direct information, but it can let him see the scent trail left in the air by, say, cologne. 

Supporting cast...let's leave that as Jackie, for now. 

Normally at this point I would describe Connor as a superhero and state what the public knows about him, and let the other people at the table come up with his superhero name. Since it's just me, however, I'll have to do it. 

So, Connor isn't the "wear a bright costume and get on TV" kind of hero. He probably started doing hero stuff when a drug deal went bad in the club - he went to intervene but the owner stopped him and some guy got stabbed. Connor followed the stabber and his crew later on, and wished he could confront them without being recognized. The skin-slime responded, changing his face and altering his voice, and making him stronger and tougher. He jumped into the midst of them and pounded them all senseless. The guy who did the stabbing, though, he let the skin-slime drain his life almost to the point of death, and told the others that killing people wasn't tolerated anymore, even if someone owes them money. 

Costume-wise, probably he just wears black. His face looks weird and malformed, thanks to the skin-slime, and the slime sometimes flows to various parts of his body to beef up certain muscles or shield him from a blow. So probably he looks liquidy and blobby, and the thugs started calling him "the Smear." That's gross, and Connor probably wouldn't use it himself (at least not during the first issue). 

Icons! These are little snapshots that could be drawn in a comic panel. I get one red and one blue (it's a yin/yang kind of thing in the game). 

Red: The Smear pins the DEA agent against the wall by his face, the slime flowing of his wrist and over the man's mouth. His eyes widen in fear as he feels his skin going numb.

Blue: Connor sits on his living room floor, cross-legged, eyes closed, trying to communicate with the presence in his head. 

And that'll about do it, actually. If I were playing, I'd pick a Twist, but that's not part of chargen so much as play.

Movie #747: Guardians of the Galaxy vol 3

Guardians of the Galaxy vol 3 is, obviously, the third Guardians of the Galaxy movie in the MCU. Once again, written and directed by James Gunn, and stars Chris Pratt, Zoe Saldaña, Dave Bautista, Bradley Cooper, Sean Gunn, Maria Bakalova, Pom Klementieff, Karen Gillan, Chukwudi Iwuji, Vin Diesel, Will Poulter, and quite a lot of others.

Following the Guardians Holiday Special, which I want to rewatch now, the titular Guardians are living on Knowhere and generally guarding the galaxy. Peter Quill (Pratt), however, is still grieving the loss of Gamora (Saldaña) way back in Infinity War, and it probably isn't helped by the fact that there is a Gamora running around, but it's not the one he knows.

(Side note: Multiple times in this movie people say "she doesn't remember" her life with the Guardians, and while that's character error not filmmaker error, it still made me twitch a little.)

Anywho, the Guardians are attacked by Adam (Poulter), the creation of the Sovereign High Priestess Ayesha (Elizabeth Debicki), who whoops their collective ass until Nebula (Gillan) injures him and sends him packing. Adam manages to wound Rocket (Cooper, with Gunn providing his on-set movements), and they discover he has a kill-switch preventing him from being healed. 

Turns out Rocket is the creation of a lunatic called the High Evolutionary (Iwuji), a mad scientist obsessed with "perfecting" life. He turned Rocket from a normal adorable baby raccoon into what he is, as he had with a lot of other animals (Rocket's cohort included a walrus, a fluffy rabbit, and an otter, voiced by Asim Chaudry, Mikaela Hoover, and Linda Cardellini, respectively), but for whatever reason Rocket turned out to be a mechanical and scientific genius. We find out in flashbacks that Rocket helped the High Evolutionary to create more docile evolved animals, but mauled him and fled after he killed off Rocket's cohort. 

(This, by the way, puts the scene in Guardians vol 1 where Rocket says "everyone's got dead people" into some perspective, huh?)

So the Guardians mount up and go in search of a way to save him, and along the way wind up going to war with the Evolutionary and bringing his latest crop of genetically engineered beings to Knowhere, along with a whole bunch of animals, including a brace of baby raccoons.

We watched Ant-Man 3 recently, and I said that one of the things that annoyed me about that movie was that no one had an arc except MODOK. Watching Guardians 3, it struck me how everyone has an arc (though some of them began earlier), even Gamora, who is more or less a bit player here. Everyone has screen time, all of the principle cast is significant and moves things along. Compare/contrast with Evangeline Lily in Quantumania, who might as well have not been there. James Gunn has been building to the story of Rocket the whole time, and that preparation shows as we finally learn why Rocket is what he is. It's not a retcon or a backhanded justification, and seeing that kind of buildup paid off is really satisfying. 

The moment that makes me cry, however, is Nebula telling Drax (Bautista) that what he is and has always been is a dad, not a destroyer. Again, that's so obviously true, and it's been there since we first met him - his motivation has always been his family, he just didn't have a way to express it other than violence for a long time. 

I like that the movie isn't about Star-Lord, since he was pretty much the anchor of the first two. He gets a plot, sure, but they all do, and his is a B-plot. And, everyone gets a moment at the end to consider their next step and take it - Mantis (Klementieff) going off to find herself with three big fuck-off monsters in tow, Nebula staying to lead Knowhere, Quill going to home to Earth, Drax raising the children rescued from the Evolutionary, Gamora back with her chosen family (the Ravagers), and Rocket and Groot (Diesel) leading a new incarnation of the Guardians.

About the only complaint I have is that, like all of the Guardians movies, there are some moments that just kind of land with a clunk (see Drax calling Gamora a "whore" in the first movie, f'rex). Here it's Mantis calling Drax stupid and then making him forget it - it just felt unnecessary and mean. That's one beat in the movie, though, and for the most part the dynamics between the characters read like they should: these are people who love each other but are, on their own, very damaged individuals. 

If this is the last Guardians movie, then fine, it ended. If we get another one (likely not directed by Gunn), then it really needs to be made by someone who loves these characters but is going to apply the same story-craft to them that Gunn did. Here's hoping.  

My Grade: A
Rewatch Value: Medium-high

Next up: John Wick Chapter 4

Character Creation: Runecairn: Wardensaga

Time to reload a save or some shit.

The Game: Runecairn: Wardensaga
The Publisher: By Odin's Beard
Degree of Familiarity: None
Books Required: Just the one

Every so often I run into a game or a type of game that proves just how big this hobby is. I mean, I consider myself pretty goddamn well-versed in RPGs and the variety that's out there. I own literally thousands of games, but then I hit stuff like Mothership and Into the Odd and Cairn (not this one, this one) and basically the whole OSR paradigm and I'm just reminded that there's a lot of shit that's not remotely on my radar. That isn't to say it's bad or I don't/wouldn't like it, it's just that I'm kinda out of the loop of what's hip in game design because I'm not in it anymore. 

Well, anyway, Runecairn:Wardensaga is basically Dark Souls but an RPG. I don't know about the aesthetic (I haven't played Dark Souls and the closest I've gotten is watching Michelle play Bloodborne), but in this game you can die a number of times equal to your Vigor, you respawn at bonfires when you do die, and you collect souls in order to make yourself stronger. In-setting, Ragnorak has happened and the world is borked (which, since I've been played through God of War: Ragnorak lately, is what spurred me to read this game), but I dunno, the game just feels thin. There's some cool stuff in here, but it's meant for a single player and a GM (though you can play it with more players and I don't see anything that would break if you did). 

SO ANYWAY chargen is mostly random, so it's not gonna take long to whip up a doomed adventurer. I think I need to make a character for something a bit more trad next. Maybe I'll check out Infected. 

OK, first thing we do is choose or roll for a name. I'ma gonna roll. Guðmundr. Sounds great. Roll for more traits. Physique: Short. Skin: Mottled. Hair: Luxurious (obviously. duh.). Face: Sunken. Speech: Cryptic (ooooh, spooky). Gregarious, but vengeful. So far, so good! 

Next we roll 3d6 for each Ability, and then swap any two if we want. Strength 8, Dexterity 7, Wits 6 (wtf), Spirit 9. That sucks. Guðmundr ain't gonna last very long. 

Roll 1d6 for Vigor...3. I have 3 deaths before I become a shade. 1d6 for Vitality gives me 4. Resilience is the sum of those two, so 7. 

And now I pick a class, with the understanding that it only defines what I was, not what I will become (what I will become is likely "dead"). I think I'll just throw myself into it and be a Warrior. 

Otherwise, there are a bunch of symbols on the sheet that I don't understand, a box for "Speed" but that trait is never explained, so I think I'm done!

Guðmundr was a warrior who managed to stay alive, though probably not distinguished. Pays more attention to grooming his hair than trying to kill monsters, which is probably going to get him killed. Also he talks too much. 

Atlantis: Meet Jengo

Last night was Atlantis, and the beginning of a new, and probably the final, adventure. 

Recall that last time, Thanos perished rather than suck down some demon-god-brain and become corrupt. Since then, 16 months have passed, and the heroes have pursued their separate interests. And now, in the month of Adaru, they have met back up in the fortified port city of Serpentslice (look, I didn't name it) on the western coast of the continent of Mu. 

Port Serpentslice is an interesting place. It's the only human settlement on Mu, which is largely populated with Uluka and Ophidians. It's also mostly escaped or freed slaves, so the heroes have a bit of a soft spot when they here of the city's predicament. 

About a year ago, a strange, ghostly ship rose from the depths of the ocean and passed nearby Port Serpentslice. It brought with it violent storms and huge waves, but then went back out to sea. And then, six months ago, it came back, this time closer. The storms returned, and in addition, undead Tritons crawled out of the ocean and grabbed citizens, dragging them down into the depths. And now the mysterious ship is coming back, and this time might actually reach the city's port. 

Imani has rented out a suite in the city's best inn, and greet Eithne and Akala warmly. Eithne has calluses on her hands from a year of farming, while the furrows under Imani's eyes have grown deeper and darker from grief (her father died in battle in Nubia not long ago). Akala, too, looks more focused and serious than usual. She witnesses the flying city of Ankat crash in southern Gondwana and worries about the implications for her own home, the Uluka City.

The heroes talk amongst themselves, catch up, and then someone drops in through their window. A Netherman has been listening on an awning, and he introduces himself as Jengo. He offers his services as a sword and a thief - he has followed coin most of his life, but recently had a change of heart and wants to do something for the world and the people in it. 

The heroes are skeptical, but the deciding factor proves to be Thanatos, Thanos' jackal. He cocks his head at Jengo, sniffs him, and then cautiously allows him to pet his head. The characters decide to let him stay - they'll need the help anyway. What seals the deal is that Jengo mentions that her knew Mosi, Imani's brother, and in fact gave a eulogy at Mosi's funeral service. Imani asks how that was possible - Mosi was executed in Gorgos, and a Netherman walking around in Gorgos, much less delivering a eulogy for a political prisoner - would have been noticed. Jengo allows that he might be confusing some things, but he did know Mosi, just maybe from before he was imprisoned.

What they don't know, of course, is that Jengo had been stalking Thanos for some time before his death. When his body was being prepared for entombment in Khem, Jengo crept in and ate his heart. This is something that Nethermen can do - they eat the hearts of another and gain some ability or attribute. In Jengo's case, it granted him some of Thanos' memories and his love of freedom. Sometimes he confuses those memories for his own. I suspect this may become a point of contention at some point.

Anyway, the heroes talk about their options and determine that they need to know more about this ship. They go down to the docks and talk to the sailors, who are mostly in the process of battening down the hatches in preparation for the coming storm/zombie plague. They meet a man named Eehu, who agrees (after Imani greases his palms considerably) to take them out towards the ghost ship in his skiff. They decide to wait until morning, both because none of them fancy being out on the ocean in a small boat at night, and because Akala wishes to pray to Ochosi for help with the winds.

Akala spends most of the night in prayer, and Ochosi eventually answers, though she gets the feeling that Ochosi sees this as a people-related matter (and this particular god is more interested in animals). She does, however, gain the ability to influence the winds, which she figures will be useful for the storms get too intense.

On the morrow, the heroes set out. They can see dark clouds on the horizon, which Eehu tells them is the ship incoming. They sail up near it, and see the spectral ship coming closer to Port Serpentslice. They can tell that the ship is older than the current era, but none of the heroes are really historians so more detailed analysis eludes them. Akala does notice two things of especial note, though: The ship's name along the side (Messenger), and what looks like a ghostly Jinn standing at the bow. 

They also see shapes moving in the water. Jengo fires an arrow at one, and an undead Triton (with an arrow in its back!) leaps onto the boat and lurches for them. Eehu screams, and Jengo brains it with his club, knocking it lifeless to the deck. 

Akala points out the Jinn, and Eithne whistles a greeting in Chaos Speech. The ghostly ship stops short, and the Jinn looks down and responds. Eithne asks her name, and she tells her it's Sauda. Sauda claims that she is pursuing a slave ship called the Skartorius, carrying her lover Faraji. 

The heroes are, of course, no fans of slavers, and they'd be happy to help Sauda, but ask if maybe she could refrain from getting too close to Serpentslice. Maybe they could bring the Skartorius out to her? She agrees, and the Messenger sinks into the ocean. Akala notes that she's heard stories of the Skartorius, but can't quite recall the details. When they discuss it, Eehu fills in some gaps. The Skartorius is rumored to sail the Kanawalla Desert in the southwest of Mu. He's heard it's crewed by spectres in service to some dark god, harvesting the souls of the living. But that's just what he's heard. And anyway, the desert is much more dangerous than a ghost ship.

The heroes head back to Serpentslice where they are greeted with celebration (because Eehu tells everyone they sank the ghost ship, which is technically true but missing some important context). They begin planning their trek out into the Mu interior, which they know is populated by vicious predators and bands of Ophidians.

Board Game: The Wolves

Awooo.

The Game: The Wolves
The Publisher: Pandasaurus Games
Time: ~60 minutes
Players: Me, Michelle, Gus, Megan

Game Play: The Wolves is a pack-building/worker placement sort of game. Everyone gets a wolf pack (Desert Wolf, Forest Wolf, Tundra Wolf, etc.). The differences are largely cosmetic, except that everyone has a slate of terrain tiles that act as currency during the game. When you take actions, you flip the terrain tiles, which changes the terrain, except that each wolf pack has a type of terrain with a double-sided tile so it's always available. 

Forest Woof

Actions include moving your wolves, building dens, upgrading dens to lair, howling and recruiting lone wolves, and dominating wolves and dens from other packs. All of these require you to flip tiles based on your target, so if you want to howl at a lone wolf on a tundra tile, you need to flip two tundra tiles.

In a dance as old as time

When you build dens or dominate wolves, you remove meeples from your board, which uncovers new capabilities (move further, howl louder) or grants you bonus tokens for extra actions or free terrain moves. Getting those tiles is actually the only way to be able to use three of a given tile in a turn (except the one specific to your pack, so for example as the Forest Wolf pack I have three forest tiles in my array but only two of everything else), and you need three to dominate a wolf or den. 

Choices, choices

Every time you remove a piece from the board (replace a lone wolf token with one of your wolves, steal a den, upgrade a den, etc.) the piece taken from the board goes on the moon chart. At certain points on the chart, you score a region based on which moon phases token is there. At the end of the game, you score back one what you've uncovered on your board.

Fierce competition

Opinions: I've been wanting to try this game for a while. I like worker placement games and this one has woofs, which is fun. I was, however, as always, a little worried it would fall flat in the execution, but it's really a lot of fun. 

As with many such games, the first time playing is a little fumbly because you don't know what effect certain choices will have. I think that here, you kinda need to get out to all of the region tiles quickly and establish a presence, since scoring is dependent on how many figures you have in a given region. Being able to dominate is also important, and avoiding getting dominated comes back to paying attention to who's around you and what tiles they have access to (if you stick to your own terrain it's less likely, but that's always not generally practical for very long). 

The production values are also good - the art is beautiful, the meeples and cardboard components are sturdy, and although everything is fiddly it's easy to tell where everything goes. Generally I think it's really well done, and there are multiple viable strategies to rack up victory points, which is always a good sign.

MICHELLE IS THE DOMINANT WOOF

 Keep? Yep

Cairn: The Gavel Falls

Today was Cairn. Let's doOOOOOoooo it! /flashheart

Our heroes have learned the truth about the murder of Ladd Ringtail - that Knuckles, at the behest of Moriarty Sprit, killed him. They've captured Knuckles, but Moriarty escaped after knocking Russelet Leatherwind out. 

The Knights head back into town and split up. Knowing that time is of the essence, they decide to try and find Moriarty as quickly as they can. But he's probably go to the Underground, and navigating that area is difficult without a guide.

Snootabur Shadowbough goes to visit Ladd's parents, and asks if they know anyone in the rat community that might help the Knights. Ladd's father, Alum, takes her to his cousin Merton Ringtail. Merton is shady, he says, but he was fond of Ladd. Snootabur asks Merton to help them go into the Underground and look for Moriarty, and he's initially unenthused ("oh, why don't you just twist off my tail, salt it, and serve it like jerky?!"), but does agree in the name of getting justice for Ladd. He does say that the instant his chances of getting stabbed go up he's out of there.

Ratatosk Longberry goes to the Root to talk to Ripark ("oh, you again") and asks for help with the Underground. Ripark considers, and says that he can't guide the characters through the Underground ("It would violate something I can't even explain to you"), but does agree to them get into the Underground through the entrance in the basement of the Root. It's one of the few fixed points in the Underground, he says.

Meanwhile, Russelet and Rumdiggle Sunsong talk to Knuckles, or at least try. Knuckles admits that he "brained" Ladd, and that the "boss" told him to do it, but he's not saying much else. As they leave, Russ hears Juffin Longbottom and Severin Prideheart (the Constable and the Captain of the Guard, respectively) talking about execution. 

The Knights meet up with Merton and head to the Root. He leads them through some twists and turns, and then stops them. "He's up ahead," whispers Merton. Russelet drinks an invisibility potion (courtesy of Ratatosk) and sneaks up. And indeed, Moriarty Sprit is in a big storeroom - weapons, clothes, spices, food, all kinds of stuff. He's packing a bag, quickly but deliberately, but then Russ loses his footing and slip into the room. Moriarty perks up, and then blows out his candle and vanishes.

Russ moves to the corner and grabs for a bow hanging on the wall (he didn't bring his because the potion wouldn't have concealed it). He loses track of Moriarty, however, and the wily weasel sneaks up and clunks him on the head, knocking him out. But the Knights hear this and rush in!

Ratatosk spots Moriarty and leaps on him, holding fast. Moriarty slashes at him with a sword, and then drops it and draws a dagger. Snootabur nocks an arrow, but Moriarty flings a knife and snaps the string on the bow. Ratatosk casts a spell and the roots in the ground curl up and hold Moriarty fast!

Rummy turns into a snake and strikes, trying to paralyze Moriarty with poison. It just seems to make him mad, however. He bites at Ratatosk, and Snoot bonks him with her staff, but then figures waking up Russ might be a better idea. She shakes him awake and he grabs one of her sleep arrows and shoots it into Moriarty's shoulder, but he still doesn't drop.

Rummy curls her snake-tail around his snoot to keep him from biting, Ratatosk cancels the spell, and Snootabur runs in to tie him up. They finally get him immobilized and tied to Snoot's staff, and haul him back to Cairn.

Later that night, the Lord Mayor Keeble Brownberry sends for the Knights, and they find themselves meeting with Keeble, Juffin, Severin, Whisper Greendawn (the priest of the local Lodge), and Asta Ringrunner (the town's alchemist). Keeble explains that while the law of Cairn means that punishment is at his discretion, he wants input from everyone here.

Juffin and Severin advise execution, but the Knights (and Whisper) are firmly opposed to capital punishment. As Rummy points out, it's something you can't come back from. Keeble notes that there's precedent - a Dire otter once sank a boat in the bay and killed a bunch of citizens and was then put to death - but that was a long time ago and he was, after all, Dire. Juffin notes that Moriarty not being Dire isn't exactly a point for mercy - if he's not Dire and he still did all this, why let him live?

Russelet recommends exile, and sending word to other communities not to give aid or comfort to these miscreants. Exile sounds better than execution, but, as Asta notes, doesn't that just drive them to associate only with those who flaunt the law? And doesn't that put other citizens at risk? 

The Knights consider, and then investigate a little more. They bring in Jiddie Littlebrook, the rat who acted as Moriarty's face in all this. Jiddie tells them what she knows: Moriarty had her solicit support for Moriarty's pick for Lord Mayor in the upcoming election (but doesn't know who exactly that pick is), in exchange for preferential treatment in housing. She knew nothing about Ladd until after he was already dead, and expresses sorrow and remorse at how things turned out. Russ asks her why she should be allowed to stay in Cairn; she explains she has nowhere else to go. She and her brother and sisters came to Cairn from the hamlet outside Crystal Rock after the Knights destroyed the strange magical crystal there, but only she survived the journey (and lost her tail in the process). 

Next, the Knights talk to Knuckles. In so doing, they realize that Knuckles is slow, and while he's big, strong, and violent, he's not necessarily dangerous by nature. He says, in fact, that he doesn't really like hurting people, it's just what he's good at. The Knights ask if he'd be willing to put his strength to use for the town, and he says he would.

They bring in Alum Ringtail and his wife, Bernit (Ladd's parents) and explain the situation to them, and ask what they think should happen to his killers. Alum says that if he'd been asked that yesterday, he'd probably have said "drown them both," but knowing their names, he's not quite so willing to say that. On the other hand, he doesn't think he can face his son's killer every day, but on the gripping hand, he isn't comfortable with anyone dying on his say-so. 

The Knights also send word to Ripark, feeling that the Underground should have a voice in this. Ripark sends a note back, in his customarily terse way, and says that there will be no complaint from the Underground no matter what happens to Moriarty. 

And, finally, they talk to Moriarty. He advises them to kill him - he refuses to take responsibility for anything, refuses to show remorse, and outright states that the first time the cell door is open he's going to disappear. 

The council reconvenes, and discusses all of the options. Jiddie is the easiest; she is sentenced to go to the Lodge and apprentice with Whisper Greendawn as a priest. Knuckles is going to remain incarcerated, but slowly be reintroduced to Cairn and given work, with an eye toward bringing him out of Discord and, eventually, sending him to Goblin Glen or the maybe the circus, somewhere he can be of use. 

Moriarty is to be incarcerated at the lighthouse, guarded at all times, and checked on by the Knights on a regular basis. If he ever shows true remorse and a desire to rehabilitate, that option is open, but as Whisper points out, she can't force anyone to accept the Bright Ones. Juffin disagrees - he feels that Moriarty is too dangerous to be allowed to live - but he accepts the decision of the majority.

Keeble thanks them all for their help, and tells them to go and get some rest. He has some very serious proclamations to write.

Character Creation: Dungeon Crawl Classics

This oughta be quick.

The Game: Dungeon Crawl Classics
The Publisher: Goodman Games
Degree of Familiarity: Not much. I ran a couple of games of Basic D&D back in the day
Books Required: About 1% of the core

I think it's safe to say that this is 100% not my style of RPG. With that said, if it were a true board game, I'd be all about it. And that's really what it should be - a game with dry-erase character cards where you can generate a new character(s) quickly, a bunch of minis of monsters and some random tables to generate a dungeon. Maybe with fancy new technology, a companion app to do the hard work of "GM" since it's really just about throwing monsters at you.

I don't have any particular problem with this style of play, I just don't find it interesting and I really don't like how pleased with itself the book is. It spends too much time saying "no, really, play our way, you might like it, we know most other games want you to have a concept for your character, but you should actually just make four generic characters and see which one survives the 'funnel' of character creation!"

And like, sure, I get it. It can be fun to roll dice and see how shit falls. I just think about some friends of mine who can't get into board games with complex rules because there's so much setup involved. Maybe quick chargen and straight into combat, even if all your characters die, would be OK? I dunno. I guess I just want a little more "role" in my role-playing. 

So anyway, chargen is mostly random, done in order and without a lot of wiggle room, so at least it's quick. 

Ability scores! Roll 3d6 each, in order, which gives me:

Strength 9
Agility 10
Stamina 9
Personality 9
Luck 12
Intelligence 11

Hmm. Looking spell-castery, but of course that's not a decision I get to make. Anyway, I now have to make a roll on the Luck chart, using a d30 (roll eyes). I get an 11, which gives me: Fox's cunning! My lucky roll is to find/disable traps. Well, that's not totally useless. 

Saving throws all start +0, so that's easy. I speak Common, and since my Int modifier is 0, I don't have any others. 

I get 1d4 Hit Points (1...lol gonna die), 5d12 copper (34), one random piece of equipment (hand-sized mirror), and a random occupation (hunter, which means I get a short bow and a deer pelt). I get to pick an alignment; I'll take chaotic, why not.

So my guy's name is Akitus. He's a hunter, wrapped in his best deer pelt, and figures that if he can shoot a deer and eat for a week he should be able to shoot some...cave deer or whatever they have in dungeons and get rich quick! He is 100% not getting out of his first dungeon. 

Character Creation: Drama Llamas

Watch out, they spit.

The Game: Drama Llamas
The Publisher: Button Kin Games
Degree of Familiarity: None
Books Required: Just the one

Drama Llamas is one of those wonderful RPGs that is so very niche that it wouldn't exist without crowdfunding, and I'm 100% here for it. You're playing llamas competing on reality shows, with mechanics built in for sabotaging other llamas, becoming a breakout star, and suchlike. 

It's brilliant because the premise by itself, without the llamas, would be playable but not terribly interesting, IMO. Reality TV of the sort depicted in the book - the older shows like Big Brother and so on - doesn't seem to be as popular, although certainly competition shows are still very much a thing. But with the addition of llamas, we get a ready source of absurdity and, if not genre conventions, then just RPG weirdness that makes for a hook. 

(In related news, I've been watching the 2008 reality show Scream Queens in preparation to run Drama Llamas, and trying to think of llama-related puns to work into horror movie titles and directors. Llamageddon is already a thing, fortunately or unfortunately.)

So let's make a dramatic llama. It's not gonna take long, chargen is pretty quick. Actually there's basically only two steps: pick an archetype and then fill in some details, so there's barely enough "character creation" here to qualify for the project, but eh, I like llamas. I guess I should think about what show my llama would appear on, so let's assume it's for Great Llamas Bake Stuff since that's what's in the example of play. 

First up, we choose an Archetype. One of the things I love about the actual GBBO is that people are nice to each other (as opposed to Scream Queens, which contained more casual racism than I was expecting), so I think I'll go with Miss Congeniality. That means I get two special moves: Ugly Cry (I burst into tears and have a tantrum when it all gets TOO MUCH OMG), and Do Unto Others (I help another llama in their hour of need).

So my llama's name is Jackie. Jackie wears fuzzy boots and colorful belts and pants(?) with lots of pockets, and carries candies and so on to offer to other llamas. They are firmly of the belief that we're all winners even for getting on the competition, they're really just happy to be here, and they are 100% going to fall apart if confronted with one of the meaner or sneakier archetypes' shenanigans. 

And like that's it, y'all. Stay tuned for Bleat Queens. 

Movie #746: Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves

Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves is a fantasy/comedy starring Chris Pine, Justice Smith, Regé-Jean Page, Michelle Rodriguez, Hugh Grant, Chloe Coleman, Daisy Head, and Sophia Lillis.

Bard Edgin (Pine) and his partner-in-crime, the barbarian Holda (Rodriguez) have been sentenced to prison for thievery. Edgin turned to crime following the murder of his wife Zia (Georgia Landers) in order to provide for their daughter Kira (Coleman), but was betrayed by his reprobate partner Forge (Grant) and his wizard chum Sofina (Head). After escaping, they assemble a party in order to heist money and a resurrection tablet from Forge, but along the way learn a valuable lesson about the power of friendship. Well, kinda. Really the lesson is about found family.

Anyway, the party has to venture into the Underdark with the help of GMPC Xenk (Page) to retrieve a widget to allow their under-confident sorcerer Simon (Smith) to break a magical lock, and then get stuck in the gladiatorial High Sun Games in the city of Neverwinter before realizing that the real plan has been for Sofina to cast a spell turning everyone spectating the games into undead monsters. 

Look, the movie is a D&D campaign put on film. Michelle caught a lot more of the Easter eggs than I did because she's much more familiar with Forgotten Realms, but I know the structure of an RPG campaign when I see one. Whether or not the mechanics are 100% accurate (they're not, but they're a lot closer than you'd think), what impresses me about the movie is how they managed to portray this weird fantasy world that's been created as a backdrop for an RPG - which is a very different thing than a world created as a backdrop for a novel. Magic is normalized, but it's also a formal structure and an accepted part of the world. Five-year-olds can do it, but powerful wizards are still fucking scary. The world has a history and unlike the 2000 D&D movie (the bloody awful one with Bruce Payne and Thora Birch), it movie doesn't dumb it down and skip the best parts trying to make it accessible. 

The cast displays some real chemistry, and I was pleased to see that they spent some time playing their characters in an actual D&D game, because it really feels like if you're going to do this movie you should know the source material (minus Hugh Grant, of course, who can't be bothered, but whatever, his character wasn't a PC anyway). And, the movie managed to make resurrection magic something that's possible but still special, which is hard enough to do in an RPG, let alone a movie. 

I enjoy, too, that the cast and the supporting cast isn't entirely white. It seems a small thing, and an obvious thing (in a world where fantasy races are clearly common and no big deal, it doesn't seem a problem to have, like Black people around, too, but some people do seem to get annoyed). 

As well as this movie was reviewed, though, it didn't make money at the box office. I'm not sure if it wasn't as accessible as I think, or it wasn't perceived to be such, or if this is residual shit from the pandemic, or what, but it's a little disappointing, because I'd totally go see these characters again.

My Grade: A-
Rewatch Value: High

Next up: Guardians of the Galaxy vol. 3

Character Creation: The Well

Well, well, well. It's a deep subject. (I'll stop now.)

The Game: The Well
The Publisher: Shoeless Pete Games
Degree of Familiarity: None yet, but I'm sure we'll delve into it at some point
Books Required: Just the one

The Well is a game with a very interesting setting, some amazing artwork, and a system that kinda makes me go "OK. Huh?" 

The setting is this: There's this well. It's an immense stone silo kind of thing going down forever, and every 60-some feet (21 meters, whatever the fuck that means) there's a new level. Untouched levels just have a doorway and a giant corridor, but the inhabited levels have been carved and mined and turned into habitats. At some point in the unknowable past, people fled something into the Well and kept moving down, because the dead in the crypts in levels above keep reanimating and killing them. And bones turn into shit like this:

Like I said, art's really good

So you play "gravediggers," people who venture up into the higher levels to hunt treasure and kill monsters. There are three inhabited levels collectively known as "Bastion," and in a bit of worldbuilding that I really like, the last stop before going into the up is a bar where the keeper, a former gravedigger, gives you half a shot of booze on the house with the unspoken promise that you'll be back for the other half later. 

So all of that is really cool, yeah? Like I said, though, the system is a little weird. It's roll a d6 and beat a difficulty, but the difficulty is routinely much higher than 6, and you wind up needing modifiers to hit it. You can use "gambits" for bonus dice (not too dissimilar from a Devil's Bargain in Forged in the Dark games), and so on, but I admit that I was not entirely clear on the mechanics even after reading the example of play. 

But I'm a smart guy; I'm not out of my depth. Let's make a character!

Step One: Weapons & Armor. I get three choices off this list. I kinda want paint (magic in this game is expressed through runes, which get painted onto things with luminous paint. Anyone can do it, if you know the runes, and they aren't simple). I'll take paint, which gives me a rune that I know by heart, which I'll pick later. And then I'll take a pick and a shield; no full armor, which will make me vulnerable, but also not impede movement. I think my character has fully embraced the idea that if the shit really comes down, you don't have to be fastest, just not the slowest.

Step Two is Kit. I get a basic knife, three torches, flint & steel, and a bag, plus five picks off a list. I'll take booze, bandages, another dose of paint (which gives me another rune), lockpicks, and a lantern.

Step Three is history. I need to pick what I was trained in before getting desperate enough to be a gravedigger. I think my guy was pretty much always that desperate; he was "trained" as an urchin and a criminal. He stole the lockpicks from another thief who'd gotten old and brain-rotted, and he's going upwell because he figures if he can hit a score big enough to get him an apprenticeship with a locksmith or something, he'll never have to do it again. 

Step Four! I get a Skill. I can do any of the Skills, but I'm good at one of them. It's tempting to say Mechanics, but I think Stealth makes more sense.

Step Five! Runes! I get two that I've memorized, probably because they were commonly painted near me. Let's see. I think I shall take Annul (turns off other runes), and Light (does exactly that). 

Step Six is Connections. I get friendly with one of the factions in Bastion. I think it makes the most sense to say I'm friendly with the Indigent; I know the other poor people from Bastion 1. 

Step Seven: Self-Image & Habits. First I get three descriptors to form self-image. These don't have mechanical effect, just a guide to portrayal. I think my guy is squirrely, greedy, and light-fingered. 

Habits, meanwhile, are vices that I can indulge to clear stress. Tempting to say that theft is a vice, but I think for this guy theft is professional and that stealing shit from people actually really makes him nervous. His habits are carving (like, in stone) and throwing rocks. 

Step Eight: Everything else. Resilience starts at 10, asset points start at 0, that's easy. 

Name: Folks in Bastion 1 call him Hardscrabble or just "Scrabble". He doesn't really remember his real; he thinks of himself as "Elit" but doesn't remember if that's a name, a nickname, or just something he heard. Scrabble is short, skinny, probably about 18 but could be a little older. He's missing teeth, his fingernails split easily, and he chews his lips. He's carved some meaningless symbols onto his shield and the haft of his pick, maybe for decorative purposes, maybe to hide a name that was already there (he certainly didn't buy those tools). 

I think Scrabble would be likely to get eaten by something, but it's possible he'd become loyal to a group of gravediggers during their travels, you never know. 

Slipsteam: The Fall of Queen Anathraxa

Tonight we finished the Slipstream game that began waaaaay back here. Here's last time.

Our heroes are aboard the evil Queen's flagship! They enter the Queen's quarters, and there she is, surrounded by her clones! Three of the clones are at a bank of controls, guiding the ship's descent towards the helpless fragment of Ruros! 

Craw takes to the air and flies toward the immense birdcage at the back of the room, hoping to free his king (and, incidentally, the other Bird-Man trapped there). Iris, likewise, beats her wings and flies toward the control bank, hoping to get the ship under control. Abbas roars and leaps to the bed (oh, right, Anathraxa was on an immense bed in the middle of the room), and lands next to the Queen! Zeenia strikes, disintegrating one of the clones. 

Speaking of the clones, one of them rocket-belts over to the squad of Nivek warriors, swords drawn. Another attacks Abbas, while the ones at the control banks activate deathtraps! Some infernal device on top of the tank holding Prince Zeemar begins powering up, so Gruff activates his rocket-belt to fly up and try and disable it. Spike fold down from the roof of the birdcage as well...

Queen Anathraxa looks deep into Abbas eyes, and suddenly he finds his perfect mate in this dark Queen. She hisses at him to "kill the jellyfish," and Abbas turns away, but then feels the pendant that Lady Rooara gave him and remembers his true love. He wheels around and draws his laser sword, slicing the Queen, and she teleports away to the control bank. 

Zeenia turns invisible and starts moving toward the Queen. Gruff disables the device on top of Zeemar's tank, and then flies over to the birdcage to help Craw out. He and Craw manage to open the cage, free Boolar and Corvu, and Craw flies to aid Iris.

Iris, meanwhile, is crossing blades with a clone. Abbas blasts another clone into dust with his rifle, and the Nivek warriors fire arrows at the clone attacking them. She lays one of them low and dodges their arrows for a time, but eventually one of them gets a headshot off and the clone crumbles to dust. 

The Queen herself spots Zeenia and leaps to the attack, but Zeenia is far too skilled a combatant. She strikes at the Queen, slicing up her armor and bloodying her, and Anathraxa teleports away. She winds up in front of Craw and uses her mind powers on him, forcing him to guard her. Iris tackles Craw and tries to wrestle him away, and Craw, seeing his friend and companion, snaps out of the control.

But the Queen seizes the opportunity! She flies behind Iris and stabs her ("never turn your back on me, little bird!"). Craw scoops her up and flies her out of the battle, and the Nivek warriors, seeing their opportunity, pelt her with arrows. They don't harm her, of course, but they distract her long enough for Zeenia to slither up.

She strikes with her tentacle blades, stabbing the Queen multiple times, and Anathraxa falls, dying. XK27 brings the ship under control, and the war, finally, is over.

The armada mops up the Queen's remaining forces, and the heroes return to Avia in triumph. Iris stays on Avia with the Blackwing brothers (Sennett and Corvu), while Abbas returns to Simba to marry Lady Rooara. Zeenia, meanwhile, decides that marriage just isn't for her, and after years wandering the Slipstream and having adventures, Zeemar is just boring. She and Gruff and XK27 and the Niveks continuing adventuring, fighting evil and working for justice wherever they are needed! 

FIN

Roll credits

Movie #745: Ant-Man & The Wasp: Quantumania

Ant-Man & The Waps: Quantumania is, of course, the third Ant-Man movie in the MCU, and stars Paul Rudd, Evangeline Lilly, Michael Douglas, Michelle Pfeiffer, Jonathan Majors, Kathryn Newton, Corey Stoll, Katy O'Brian, and (sigh) Bill Murray.

Some time after Endgame, Scott Lang (Rudd) is doing pretty well for himself. He's written a bestseller about his experiences (and I'd just like to pause and note that I think that's a really solid character choice), he's got a good relationship with Hope Van Dyne (Lilly) and his daughter Cassie (Emma Fur- no, wait, not anymore, now it's Kathryn Newton). Sure, Cassie is getting on the wrong side of the law by going out and shrinking police cars to prevent the cops from tear-gassing homeless families, but that's not really a big deal, is it? Also, speaking of law enforcement, the charges against Hank Pym (Douglas) and Hope appear to have been dropped, since Hope is now running her father's old company and Hank is happily settling into grandpa-mode with his wife Janet (Pfeiffer).

And then one day, Cassie figures out how to send a message to the Quantum Realm, a gateway opens up and sucks the four of them in, and they wind up in a sub-atomic universe ruled by a brutal conqueror - Kang (Majors). Turns out Janet was indirectly responsible for giving him enough of his future-tech back (after he crash-landed in the Realm) to take the place over, and then acted as a freedom fighter until Hank rescued her. She never saw fit to mention any of this, however. 

So the family is stuck in the middle of a civil war between Kang and his army (including Darren Cross (Stoll), shrunk down and deformed into the cybernetic hunter MODOK) and a ragtag group of weirdos led by Sentorra (O'Brian). With the help of some suddenly technologically-advanced ants, they destroy Kang's army and win the day! And then go home.

I have some mixed feelings about this movie. On the one hand, I don't think it deserved the hate it got. I think it stemmed from the effects not really being up to snuff (MODOK especially), but they look better on the small screen. I think the performances are perfectly solid, the main cast has some real chemistry, and while I'm a little iffy about why it was necessary to recast Cassie (especially without telling Emma Fuhrmann, who played her in Endgame, since that's a shitty thing to do), Kathryn Newton fits in nicely. Paul Rudd is charming as always and anchors the movie, and it's cool that Michael Douglas' Pym has had his rough edges smoothed over since getting Janet back. Likewise, the visuals in the Quantum Realm are beautiful, the tech is appropriately weird and goopy, and of course Jonathan Majors is awesome as Kang.

On the other hand, though...literally no one in the movie has an arc except fucking MODOK. There's no character growth, and like, Scott's had plenty so if he was going to take a back seat, that's fine, but then hey, since the movie is called Ant-Man & THE WASP, how about we actually have the titular Wasp play a real role in the movie? Evangeline Lilly does fine for as much as she's there, but she doesn't get to do much and she definitely doesn't get to develop. They kinda set Cassie up to become a budding superhero, and I guess they do that, but again, what did she learn? How did she grow (other than literally)? 

And then there's fucking Bill Murray. Look, I know Murray is considered this massive comic genius, but here's my hot take: He's overrated, he's past his prime, and it's getting boring to watch him play absolute dickbuckets all the time. But more particularly, what the hell was his role here? He's in the movie for exactly one scene, just long enough to tease Janet about being his former lover and then betray them to Kang, and then he...gets eaten by an octopus, I guess, and we never see him again? I just don't see why the stunt casting was necessary for a scene that should have been cut anyway.

And also, I don't hate MODOK, but he got too much screen time. There were more interesting characters (like, oh, say, Kang), and we come away from this movie knowing that Kang exists but not having any particular reason to be afraid of him, getting glimpses of Janet being a badass freedom fighter but never actually seeing that part of her life or having it have any real, specific impact (everyone's afraid of Kang and has heard of Janet, but they cut references to anything specific to make room for more ooze jokes, I guess).

I dunno. It's charming, but in trying to up the stakes and, ironically, the scale from previous Ant-Man movies they missed out a lot of what was fun about them (including Michael Peña, which is a real shame). 

My Grade: B-
Rewatch Value: Medium

Next up: Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves

Character Creation: Smoke & Glass

Well, we were supposed to be gaming today, but life was not cooperative, so instead I'll make a character for this here game. 

The Game: Smoke & Glass
The Publisher: Phoenix Outlaw Productions
Degree of Familiarity: None with this game, but it's Fate Core
Books Required: The Smoke & Glass book and probably Fate Core

Smoke & Glass is a steampunk setting for Fate - says so right on the cover. One of my consistent complaints about games that purport to be steampunk is that they skimp on the "punk" bit, but this one very much delivers. There's a lot going on in-setting, a lot of social change in the offing, and characters are meant to be criminals, lawmen, or vigilantes, so none of this "you're adventurers!" hogwash. 

Also, for whatever reason, I found the history and setting of the game very readable. I actually did a little work with the author on some Changeling books, and I was impressed with her work then, too, so it's not so much a surprise, I guess.

Anyway, let's do a character living the city of Kroy. Kroy is very much inspired by New York (you might notice that "Kroy" is "York" spelled backways), it's even divided in boroughs. And there's a whole "run across the rooftops" aspect to the city that even has its own Skill (Sky Path), in case you want to indulge your inner love of parkour. And seeing as how this week is my birthday and today has been kinda shit so far, I think maybe I'll do that. 

Hmm. When you think of rooftop-runners in games like this, it's easy to think of thieves or couriers (a la Faith from Mirror's Edge). I like a challenge, though, so I'm gonna say my character is a lawman, specifically a Detective. Detectives in this setting gather evidence that they present to judges, so an asshole detective could probably grift or extort the people of his neighborhood pretty effectively. I do not wish to make such a character, however, but maybe my guy is replacing one.

Yeah, let's say Detective Tavik Anderssen (for tis his name) was doing his mandatory two years under a mentor before being appointed a detective in Riverside, but during that time, the Detective-at-Large in the Riverside Slums was a real sonofabitch named Carl Kingsford. Kingsford sold his services to the criminal element - need evidence to go away or point to someone else? Carl's got you (for some glims). When Tavik was let out into the slums as a detective, the first thing he wound up doing was presenting evidence against Kingsford, and through some good luck, persistence, and the fact that Kingsford had made enemies, the charges stuck and Kingsford got taken away. 

So now Tavik's running the Sky Path (he enjoys the vantage points) and doing detective work, but he's less interested in punishing the guilty than helping people make their own way. After all, judges have no shortages of work, so it's not like bringing in fewer cases is going to be make him look bad, right? And anyway, he keeps meticulous notes. 

OK, good start, let's put some shit on the sheet. This looks like mostly normal Fate Core stuff, other than the stunts, which I'll get to. Let's start with Aspects.

Tavik's High Concept is Rising Star Detective of Riverside, that's easy. I feel like his Trouble Aspect needs to refer back to his takedown of Kingsford, so let's make that Kingsford's Associates Want a Word. And normally of course we'd do a Phase Trio but it's just me, chickadee, so let's come up with a few more Aspects.

I definitely want one to reflect him being at home on rooftops - maybe even once part of an urchin gang that ran around the Sky Path. Sure, they were called the Smoke-bats, and a lot of them still live in Riverside and have entered into professions both legal and not. So let's say Tavik is a Smoke-Bat for Life. Ooh, I also really like the Ture (the civilization that lives in the woods and is eternally at war with Kroy, or rather the country that includes Kroy), so we'll say Tavik has Mysterious Parentage - pale skin and straight black hair that you don't see so much with Meridians. And, finally, let's do one about his ideals, because I feel like that would be a central point for the character: Observe, Serve, Protect. 

Right, over to Skills. The usual ladder, except there are several new Skills, including Sky Path, which is basically using the Sky Path to your advantage. I question whether it needs to be a separate Skill - feels like you could accomplish the same thing with Athletics and an Aspect or stunt - but for chargen purposes I'll stick with it and make that my Great Skills. 

My Good Skills can be Investigation and Notice, and then for Fair let's do Lore, Empathy, and Rapport. For Average, then, we'll do Will, Physique, Fight, and Contacts.

Stunts! There are stunt trees under each "class". I think I'm required to take them? I don't know if I wanna, though. Let's see.

Well, definitely the Detective Stunt (+1 to Notice, Investigate, and Lore when on a case). I'll take Sleight of Paperwork (it's spelled "Slight" in the book but I think that's a mistake, and it's not a good name for this stunt in any case), which lets me make an Investigate roll to learn facts about a case.

And then I could take The System Works for You, which builds on Sl(e)ight of Paperwork, but it's not in-concept. I want something that takes Tavik out into the community or up onto the Sky Path a bit more. In an effort to keep Tavik from being too much more like my Ministry Initiative character, I shall do the latter. I'll take the Sky Jumper stunt; I can use Sky Path instead of Athletics when running around on rooftops (see, shouldn't I be able to do that anyway? Not sure why Sky Path and Old Path need to be Skills at all, but whatever).

I get an extra stress box from my Will and Physique scores, and apart from description, that's it! I picture Tavik as being played by a young Wes Bentley, I think.

Board Game: Eaten by Zombies

Grargh, blargh, zombie, brains...

The Game: Eaten by Zombies
The Publisher: Mayday Games
Time: Felt longer than it actually was
Players: Me, Amanda, Michelle

Please ignore the binder, I had to raise up the game box

 Game Play: Eaten By Zombies is a deck-building game, and it works more or less like most of them do. You've got a bunch of piles of cards laid out before you (as Pearl Jam says), and every turn you have the opportunity to "buy" cards from various piles. You've got a hand of six cards, and when it empties, you redraw from your deck, and when that empties, you reshuffle your discard and on you go.

MADNESS!

First thing you do is decide which cards you're going to play with. You can do it randomly, but there are suggested arrangements, so we went with the "first game" one. It's pretty standard zombie fare; binoculars, a few different guns, and your starting hand consists of some heavy sticks, a "Hide" card, a sandwich, that sort of thing.

Every turn, you start by flipping up the top card of the zombie deck, forming the "Horde." On your turn, you can either fight the Horde or flee from it. All zombies have a level and an Attrition rating. If you're fighting, you play cards with a Fight rating, if you're fleeing, you play cards with a Flee rating. Fight rating is totaled and applied to each zombie in turn, so if you've got three zombies in the Horde rated levels 2, 3, 1, and you play cards total four Fight, you're only killing the first zombie (since it's level 2, and now you've only got 2 Fight left, which isn't enough to handle the second zombie). Fleeing works similarly, except you've got to match the Attrition totals of all the zombies in order to get by them.

The Horde approaches

Different cards might have different effects. The Crowbar, f'rex, gives you a +1 to Fight but also gives you a bonus to Salvage, Salvage being the "currency" you use to buy cards. You can play as many cards as you want, including cards that let you draw more cards, but you have to decide if you're Fighting or Fleeing before you start playing and you can't redraw your hand until the end of the turn ("Draw" cards notwithstanding). 

If you don't Fight/Flee all the zombies, you take some damage, in the form of the Horde's Attrition. Attrition means you discard cards from your hand, discard pile, or from the top of your deck back into their component piles. If you Fight zombies, the zombies you defeat go into your deck.

So in practical terms, fighting zombies swells your deck with zombies, which are largely useless except that you can play a zombie when another player turns up the Horde card at the beginning of their turn. Taking damage means you lose useful cards from your deck, and if you lose all of your cards you die and become a zombie. Play continues until either everyone but one is a zombie or the zombie deck and the Horde are empty (meaning everybody wins!). 

Which is what happened with us, hence Amanda's jubilant smile

Opinions: The danger of deck-building games, I think, is that they can get tedious, and oh my lord does this one get tedious. Obviously I'm sure the game changes when you include different card mixes, but as displayed in this first game, I'm sure that eventually someone would have had a run of bad luck and died, but as it was, we'd lose a hand, lose some cards, but then the next turn get dealt all of our Fight or Flee cards, beat some zombies, get some more cards, so on and on. 

Plus, the game's text (in the manual and on the cards) is very small and hard to read, and the game's instructions aren't explained especially well. I think that, as is often true of games that are badly written, it might be better on a second playthrough because I'd understand what was going on, but games of screw your neighbor (see also Munchkin) work better when "screwing your neighbor" takes them out of the game rather than just prolonging everything. 

And also, if we want zombie-related games, we have Dead of Winter or Zombies!!. If we want deck-builders, we have Eschaton and Dominion. This one kinda just feels token for both.

Brains?

Keep? Nah, probably not