Tuesday, October 13, 2026

D&D: Falling Sand

No time for pleasantries! There's a thief about!

Last time, the heroes saved Téodóir's life from a stabbing. They head down to the vault, and find the door ajar and the alarm going off. That ceases after a few seconds, and more of the staff emerges. 

One of them shows the characters how the vault works - there's a sliding panel that contains several switches, which have to be flipped in a particular order to open it. But they aren't flipped at all, meaning someone opened the vault without them. Zook theorizes someone just used a knock spell (simple enough to learn for wizards or sorcerers), and the staff agrees that the vault is mostly for basic stuff - anyone with anything really serious to lock up who also has the money to stay here is more likely to shell out for something more impressive. 

But that doesn't help the characters - they discover that Aindriú's box is gone! Dara looks around and finds a blood trail (from the dagger this thief used to stab Téodóir, probably), and then a little ways out of the back door, a bloody rag. Zook fetches Maeve and suggests Dara turn into a dog, too, and the two of them can track this guy! 

Dara obligingly goes canine, and Zook saddles up Maeve. The two of them scamper off, while the others get their stuff together and try to determine who this thief was. Téodóir didn't get a good look at him, but says he was human-sized, wearing a cloak with a hood. The heroes start heading out into the city, when suddenly they see a blue dragon swoop in over Cian, spitting lightning! 

Let's back up. Dara and Zook follow the scent of the thief through the alleys of the nicer section of Cian, and make good time - Zook spots a man in a cloak carrying a box up ahead. He spurs Maeve on, but the man dips behind a building for a second. Zook rounds the corner and sees the guy, just as the dragon swoops in!

Zook, however, guesses that the dragon might be an illusion - it's too convenient otherwise. He casts blindness at the thief, while Dara catches up, changes back to her natural form, and throws an entangle spell down the narrow alley. The thief tries to cast a spell; Zook counters it, but the man turns and climbs up the wall (nimbly dodging over both the entangling plants and the grease that Zook throws after him).

Meanwhile, the others see the dragon and climb up a building to get a better look, except for Clara, who figures she won't be much help against a flying dragon and runs off to find Zook. Keenan, Fearg, and Aisling stand on a building looking at the dragon. Aisling throws some magic missiles at it, but they don't seem to bother it. She asks Fearg if he can hit it, and he hefts a javelin and says he probably can, but isn't sure what it'll do. He hucks the javelin and it strikes the dragon in the haunch...and then flies right through it! An illusion, indeed!

Dara spiderclimbs up the wall to look for the thief, but finds nothing. Clara arrives and parkours up the wall, but finds only Dara. They both see a small puff of dust at the other end of the roof, and, figuring the thief is invisible, run after it! 

They both slide down the wall into the narrow alley, but no sign of the thief. Meanwhile, the other folks are catching up, but they have to get down off a building and run down a few streets, so it takes a minute. Zook hastes Clara, and then sees the genie-box appear in the middle of the alley! He grabs for it, but his hands pass through it ("should've known"). 

Dara shuts her eyes and listens, and hears something above her. She looks up and sees the thief, not invisible (obviously), but hanging from a notch in the wall, holding the box. Clara wall-runs up and throws a flurry of punches, but only one connects (this guy is fast!). Dara takes advantage of the distraction and thorn whips him around the waist.

The thief is suddenly jerked down to ground level, and the box falls out of his hands. It strikes the ground and one single gem comes loose and rolls away...

...and then the dao stands up, howling in evil laughter. It summons a huge maul from nowhere, and brings it down, twice, on the thief's head, killing him. 

"Can you banish it, Zook?" Clara asks. "No!" the gnome replies, "that's what we were going to use the wishes for!" He throws a bunch of magic missles at it, and Fearg rages, charges in, and bashes it with his warhammer. Clara drops in behind it and strikes; it's like punching a bag of sand, but she sees some of the sand fall away from its body. Dara calls down lighting on it, and a patch of its skin turns to glass and falls. 

The dao swings its maul and strikes at Fearg (miss) and Clara (hit, and she falls prone, but immediately leaps to her feet). Aisling casts a spell and speaks to it in Terran - "You can just go home! You don't have to do this!"

"There's no plan," it replies, and swings the hammer again. 

But the dao is fighting in a cramped space, against a very persistent monk and a very angry barbarian (with lots of spell support). It turns to mist and flows through a crack in the wall, and Dara turns into a mouse and follows. Clara runs around the building to the front door and sees the dao in a tailor shop, the maul above its head. Dara turns back into elf-form, and Aisling and Fearg manage to get to the doorway in time to see the dao bring its hammer down upon the hapless man's head. 

The dao flows over to Clara, raising its hammer, but misses its swing and Clara pummels it. Aisling lets fly a bunch of magic missiles just as the dao begins to cast something, and it falls away, nothing left but sand.

The heroes take a breath. The city Strikes arrive and take statements, and the heroes sadly explain what happened and what the box is....or maybe was? It's completely inert now. One of the Strikes recognizes the thief from his clothes. His name is Nollaig, and he's...kind of an adventurer? More of a thief? (Zook notes that anyone can learn some skills, but that's not what makes a hero.) As far as anyone there knows, Nollaig wasn't for hire. All they find on him is a few gold pieces and a knit cap with some metal filigree woven in; Aisling casts identify and realizes it's a hat of disguise. Nollaig was probably trying to break line of sight long enough to use it.

But how did he even know about the box? The only people the heroes told was Séarlas at the wizard college. They decide to pay him a visit (but Zook sends Maeve back to Aindriú with a note explaining what happened, and that the genie is gone). On the way, they stop by a blacksmith to see if they can destroy this box. There's no magic in it, but they don't want someone else trying to bind a genie to it.

The blacksmith (taking the gems in the box as payment, very happily) examines the box, and then says that the has no idea what the metal is. It feels a little like gold, but it's not as heavy. He pours a bit of acid on it and, with no reaction, notes that if it's not gold, that stuff should have at least burned it a bit. Zook opines that maybe it's an alloy, and the blacksmith agrees that it might be, but again, of what? They decide to take the box with them and get more information.

At the wizard college, Séarlas receives them and is disturbed to learn about what happened. He says that he told his colleague Sinéad about the box to get her opinion, so they go and see her. Sinéad says that she didn't tell anyone - OK, well, maybe she discussed it at dinner, but...

The heroes figure it out. This was just a game of telephone that got out of control, and got around to Nollaig, who tried to steal the box. And now two people are dead and the city is in panic because of an illusory dragon. The adventurers, Zook especially, make clear to the wizards that they hold them responsible and suggest that the wizard college take care of the tailor's family (Séarlas, while he doesn't necessarily agree with the assessment of blame, agrees). The heroes trudge back to the Sapphire to talk with Aindriú. 

They find him in the common room, absently scritching Maeve's head. They explain what happened and wonder if the death of the genie undid the wishes; Aindriú says he shames to admit but he already checked, and his wealth generator still works. He apologizes for not just making his last wish and letting the heroes send the dao home without violence, and says that he'll take care of the tailor's family. He asks the heroes their next move, and they say that they were planning to go north and look into the strange writings on the goblets they found. They want to ask around a bit, though, both about those and about the box.

Aindriú says that he intends to stay in Cian a while, rebuild his staff, and then head west and see if he can find the grave of his sister, Ailís. If the adventurers would like, they'd be welcome to travel with him. They decide to think on it. In any case, they say, they're happy that Aindriú wasn't consorting with a demon - when they heard him talking to a box, they were worried. 

Aindriú, polite as always, agrees that it was a reasonable worry.

Monday, October 12, 2026

Movie #983: Reign of Fire

Reign of Fire is a post-apocalypse/action movie starring Christian Bale, Matthew McConaughey, Izabella Scorupco, Gerald Butler, and Scott Moutter. 

Quinn (Ben Thornton) is a young boy who visits his mother (Alice Krige) at her construction site in London, and is there when the crew breaks into a chamber and finds a fucking dragon. Then we fast forward a bunch of years, Quinn grows up (into Bale), and has taken charge of a group of survivors in a castle in Northumberland. They're growing food and trying to outlast the dragons, which are dying out from starvation, but they're running out of food, too, morale is low, and Quinn and his wacky Scottish buddy Creedy (Butler) are just barely holding it together.

And then an American Army dude named Van Zan shows up with a bunch of soldiers, tanks, and a fricking helicopter (dragons have been the only thing in the skies for years), and they know how to kill dragons! And they demonstrate when one comes calling...except it kills three of them, Van Zan goes psycho, grabs a few of the survivors and leads them to London to kill the only male dragon (they're "like fish," you see, the solitary male fertilizes all the eggs that the females lay), but that goes tits up, everyone except Van Zan and his pilot Alex (Scorupco) die, the immense male dragon burns the castle, and it falls to Quinn, Alex, and Van Zan to go back to London and kill the dragon!

This movie, man. There are a bunch of really cool ideas. I love the notion of an apocalypse triggered by dragons. I love that at the survivors' castle they're acting out Star Wars (well, Empire, because why both doing the boring shit?) for the kids. The sequence of the soldiers taking down the dragon was the most exciting action in the movie (well, unless super-jacked Matthew McConaughey takes his shirt off, but that's another story), to the point that the final battle against the male was forgettable. 

I think this script just needed...something? Something to punch it up and make awesome and get us to marvel at the dragons? Maybe just showing the dragons more would have helped, because you don't actually see them all that much (the shot where we finally see the male near a bunch of females for scale is pretty awesome, but very brief). 

Generally, this movie is firmly mediocre and I enjoy it because of the few spots that aren't. The cast is one (some very talented people here), the commune in the castle is pretty cool, but this is a movie that I'd love to see a remake from a more talented director/writer.

My Grade: C+
Rewatch Value: Medium 

Next up: Sinners, but I have this feeling it's gonna get bumped when I see Toasty today 

ETA: I was right, goddammit. The Adventures of Pluto Nash, FFS.

Character Creation: Witch: Fated Souls 2nd Ed

Must be the season, I guess.

The Game: Witch: Fated Souls
The Publisher: Angry Hamster Publishing
Degree of Familiarity: I ran a one-shot of the 1st edition many years ago, but that's pretty different than this
Books Required: Just the one


Many years ago, in the Before Times, I wrote a review of Witch: Fated Souls, because I was doing one-shots and reviews of games by fellow IDGN members. That review was post on RPGnet, but their reviews seem to be all be down? And I don't seem to have the draft copy. Oh, no, wait, I do! Why didn't I do a write-up for my blog on the one-shot? That's weird. 

Well, anyway, having now reread my review, it's pretty much as I remembered: I was down on the game because it seemed like it was including trad systems for the sake of them, when the real innovation in the game was in the magic systems and using magic and dealing with our demons was clearly what the game wanted us to be doing. I'm happy to say that basically everything I mentioned as a criticism in that review got addressed, including that it needed a clarity pass (I don't for a moment take credit for anything, obviously, and I'm sure the people involved in making the game would as soon spit on me as look at me, I'm just saying I'm excited about the 2nd Ed). 

So what's this game? You're playing Fated, or witches, people who sold their souls to demons for magical power. There's a robust and intricate, though not complicated, system for tracking that descent into magical power via doing favors for a demon (the short form is that you can ask your demon for more power or just service and it trades you for something it wants you to do), and the magic system looks a bit more streamlined and...not homogenized, exactly, but the systems are bit cleaner. We're using d6s instead of d10s (and only d6s, the 1st ed used a bunch of other dice for combat), the mechanics are reminiscent of Blades in the Dark in some ways, and the writing is much clearer. 

Actually, this edition is a pretty good reflection of a particular school of current(ish, the game came out in 2025 but after a fairly long publication cycle) game design. That is, it clearly takes influence from PbtA and FitD games, and it spends a little too much time harping on safety concerns. Although on the other hand, maybe a game that straight-up has the PCs owe their souls to demons does need that. 

Anyway, I'm toying with the notion of pitching this game to one of my groups, so let's make a character and see how easy that process works. 

The first thing we'd normally do is build the coven, but as it's just me we'll skip that bit. Getting into character creation, I actually do have kind of a concept. If you've been reading my game write-ups for Chill and D&D of late, you'll note that djinn have figured in to both. I didn't do that on purpose, but it has kind of brought out the notion in my brain that having wishes is a curse, not a blessing. So I think I'm gonna make a character who is a djinni (that's one of the Fate options). They can grant wishes, kind of; they actually act as intermediaries between the wisher and the Quiet. 

So first, we say before my fating... I was bored. Spencer Cross, for 'tis his name, had an associates degree and a good, but boring, job (let's say shipping/receiving for some company, it hardly matters). And he was Fated because... I didn't believe it would work. One of my buddies at work had made a wish for lots of money (he's dead now, drug overdose) and shared with me the mechanism by which one makes wishes. Spencer, always the kind of guy that wants to take something apart and see how it works, dug a little too deeply and the Quiet made him an offer. He accepted because, like, what's a soul anyway? (Oops.)

My relationship with my demon is... Vague. The Quiet is barely a demon, it's more like the oblivion at the end of all things. As such, it doesn't really have conversations with Spencer, which unfortunately has the effect of making this whole situation a little less immediate. 

Today I am... Just doing my thing. I see Spencer as the kind of guy who kind of trips into an adventure rather than going out and finding it. Or, y'know, he grants a wish that blows up. (By the way, for every seven wishes a Djinn grants, he gets one of his own! I love that detail, it's amazing and insidious.)

It just occurred to me that I watched Obsession not long ago and that might be influencing my creative process a little. 

Anyway, Stats! I get 6 points in Core, but I have to put one in each, so really I get three. Um. I guess we'll go 2 across the board.

I get 5 points in Attributes, and these can be 0, which is good because there are nine of them. Let's see here. I think I'll put 1 point in Apply, Percept, Reason, Charm, and Understand.

Concepts are Gauze, Occult, and Aether, and they're equal to their core stat + the lowest linked Attributes, which means I have Gauze 2, Occult 3, Aether 3. No, wait, Aether 2. 

Vitality Pools (Health, Composure, Power) work the same way, except with the highest linked Attribute, so 2, 3, 3, respectively. 

Influence, I get 6 points to split between Contacts, Means, and Reputation. Let's put 3 in Contacts, two in Means, one in Reputation. Spencer knows a lot of people's names and has an extensive LinkedIn list (or whatever), though people don't necessarily remember him. 

Magic! I get 4 levels of magic stuff to split between Spells, Potions, and Rituals. I have to take Level I stuff before Level II, but I don't think I have to spend two of my points on a Level II spell (though there isn't an example of chargen, so I could be wrong). I can't take a Level III during chargen, but is that because it's mathematically impossible (which it would be if these cost their level out of my four points) or just a rule? Hrm. Let's assume I get four "things", I just have to take them in sequence and I can't go over II. 

Well, anyway, I get the level 0 "Summon Demon" for free, since that's how I got into this mess. I want the level one Dukhan spell Tacit, which lets me turn invisible. I'll take the level one potion Sacro; when someone drinks it they're compelled to go protect the thing or person they love most for 24 hours. I'll take Phase (also level 1 Dukhan), because it lets me go incorporeal and that's pretty cool. And I'll take the level 1 Sah spell Read, which lets me read a person's true desire.

And then I can take a level one artefact if I want. Ugh, I'll take a corpse tooth, and say it came from my rich buddy (let's call him Ian, just to lean in a little). If I put his tooth in my mouth, I can appear as him for an hour. Ew.

That's it! Spencer is in his late 20s, thick wavy hair, soft body, brown eyes. He wavers between being willing to grant wishes and thinking it's a real bad idea but kind of being willing anyway. Maybe the Quiet has its hooks in him deeper than he thinks.

Sunday, October 11, 2026

Pugmire: The Death of the Nagayaga

Yesterday we finished our Pugmire campaign. Before we get into the game, a few thoughts on the game and the system.

A little history: We started this game in January of 2022 (!) as a one-shot, with a slightly different cast - we had Dire, Petunia, and Peppa, but the other two dogs were Douglas Canaan and Gromp Mutt. Those two players weren't able or interested in a monthly game of Pugmire, so we grabbed a couple of others and they made Boomer and Sausagedog, so the campaign proper really started in February. 

From there, we played through nine separate arcs, with the PCs leveling up once per arc, roughly (Pugmire has characters level whenever the GM damn well feels like it). The bulk of the game was taken up with the "Lost Pitbull Prince" arc, which started in March 2023 and didn't wrap up until December 2024 (this was the adventure that took them all the way from Pugmire to the Monarchies and back, with a good long stretch on the ocean and in Port Matthew, so there was a lot to it). And it was during this arc (though I'm not exactly sure which month) that we switched over to the Realms of Pugmire rules that were Kickstarted in 2023 (and I still, by the way, have not received the actual offset print version of that book, just in case you thought Onyx Path was well organized or anything - but hey, go support their current Kickstarter!). 

The new rules were overall an improvement, though they had the same issue that a lot of games like this do: They weren't stress-tested at high levels. The result was that Boomer could reliably kill any enemy in one turn, or two if it was resistant to whatever kind of damage he was throwing out. I loved that character and the way Yannick played him, but I was a bit relieved when he retired. 

Anyway, let's get into the last session! 

Previously, our canine compatriots had cleansed the subconscious minds of Bivi Affenpinscher, Ruby Labrador, Yosha Pug, and Marshmallow von Mau of the insidious dream-infection of the Nagayaga. One left: Viveka Doberman! 

The five of them - Dire Newfoundland, Gelert Sausagedog, Petunia Pibble, Peppa Papillon, and their new cat friend Hobbes von Shadow - disguise themselves as servants and sneak into the Doberman estate. The dogs there don't tend to notice servants, so as long as they stay mum, they're unnoticed (I actually just kind of hand-waved all this as far as game mechanics, because the good stuff starts when they get into Viveka's dream). They camp out in a storage room beneath her bedchamber, Not Even the mouse drugs them all and uses his psionic powers to shove them into Viveka's dream, and they fade out and appear...

...in Pugmire! But in chaos! Everyone is running and screaming, because a gigantic grey-tabby cat is destroying the city! It smashes buildings, picks up dogs and devours them, and lets out unearthly yowls! The Pioneers, of course, run towards it, trying to figure out where the Nagayaga (or its eggs) might be, but the citizens yell at them to "Run! BEWARE THE PURRASQUE!"

(I'm actually very proud of that.)

They realize quickly that there's no point in fighting something this big. Petunia concentrates, trying to figure out where the egg is, but there's too much, too much chaos, too much cat. Instead the characters start looking for Viveka. The Purrasque is smashing its way into the Palace district (MOW! crash), so they head there, and see Viveka on her battlements, obviously terrified. Hobbes notes that this might be Viveka's subconscious manifesting her bigotry and fear of cats. 

The characters race up the stairs and confront her, but she isn't interested in being helpful. Peppa nearly gets through, trading on her position as a Shepherd (and Viveka is nominally a follower of the Church of Man), but she has no idea about any "eggs" that the Pioneers keep talking about. And then she sees Hobbes and shrieks "A cat!" and casts sonic boom, blowing Petunia and Peppa off the battlements.

Petunia, fortunately, is a powerful artisan and casts manipulate gravity, allowing the two of them to float harmlessly in the air. She sniffs magic, looking for the telltale stink of the Nagayaga, and it leads her back along the Purrasque's trail of destruction. She casts her gravity spell again, allowing all of the characters to fly, and they zoom along, past the Purrasque (it swipes at Hobbes when he gets too close, but misses) and land at the edge of a huge hole in Riverwall. Clearly, this is where the Purrasque emerged.

The egg-smell seems to lead them into the hole, so they jump, they fall...

...and they emerge in Pugmire, in chaos. But this time the chaos is the unwashed masses, the poor and downtrodden, revolting! They have already erected gallows, and the characters see bodies swinging - King Puckington, Yosha Pug, Graff Doberman, Heinrich Doberman, and other nobles they recognize. The dogs in the street scream about the injustices of the rich and powerful, and Viveka is nowhere to be seen.

The Pioneers try to find the egg again, and when Petunia sniffs magic, her clothes start to change to become more peasant like. Dire notes that maybe they need to find another hole to jump down, and Hobbes picks up on that logic - the Nagayaga may have burrowed deep enough into Viveka's mind that they do have to go deeper to find it. That isn't necessarily a matter of literally going into the ground, though. 

Petunia picks up the cue and joins the mob, yelling about the rich, and Sausagedog and Dire do likewise. Peppa climbs up on a post to keep track of them, but realizes they're getting harder to see. Hobbes climbs to a roof, but can no longer see his compatriots...

...the three of them reawaken in another layer of the dream, this one looking like a paper wasp nest made by human-sized wasps (fortunately, it's clearly empty). "Maybe Viveka's afraid of wasps?" muses Dire.

Peppa, back in the previous level, watches Hobbes join the mob and vanish, and finally does so as well. She appears in a swamp full of doors - wooden doors, floating on the water. She's floating on one as well. She takes off her boots and paddles the door to shore, where she meets the others (who turn around and realize they're in a swamp now, not a nest). 

As they try to make sense of this, the water from the swamp rises up and surrounds them, and they're at the bottom of the sea, standing near weird Man-made constructs - a circular platform with wooden horses? A mining track, but going way up into the air? totally impractical. 

They talk for a moment, trying to figure out where they might need to go from here, and then the water goes away and they're in a giant gem, in a room that represents one facet. They see Viveka in another, marveling at all this. Dire tries to smash through a wall, but then the scene changes again and they're all on a simple hillock...but the last word of everything they say echoes four times.

Petunia wonders what would happen if she cast private kennel in such a place, and aims the spell such that it includes Viveka. And lo! They all vanish, and appear in a small room, nearly filled with plastic junk.

Something moves in the junk, and Hobbes grabs for it. It turns out to be a kitten, kind of - its snoot is that of a snake, its legs are too close together, and its fur is patchy and has scales in places. Hobbes grabs it and it bites him, and he feels poison spread through his system. He realizes it's wearing a collar and between him and Dire, they manage to snatch it. Dire grabs the thing by the face and crushes it, dropping it the floor...but its head reforms and it scampers off into the junk. Hobbes grabs it by the tail (and gets another bite for his trouble).

Sausagedog wraps the kitten up in his shirt, and Hobbes deciphers the writing on the collar: “A time between Man and Cat, between Man and Dog, the darkest time, go back, demon cat-snake”. 

Suddenly the shirt is empty, and they hear hissing laughter from the junk. Petunia casts shatter and a large section of the stuff explodes, exposing the kitten, Dire scruffs the kitten and Petunia rubs ointment on Hobbes' paw to cure the poison. Dire thinks about what he's read about the Nagayaga - the problem is that most of the church records of the thing are held by cats, not dogs. But Peppa has actually made a point of studying the Church records of the Monarchies!

The Nagayaga, she recalls, is a demon born of the War of Cats and Dogs. It loves fomenting conflict between them, and it craves the artifacts of Cat, Dog, and Man. That, Sausagedog realizes, might be why the creature escape the shirt; the shirt is a "made" thing. 

Hobbes holds the thing, and Dire tells him that on three, they'll strike it. He counts down and both Hobbes and Dire punch it, crushing it again, but it starts to heal. Petunia starts reciting the poem to herself to try and figure out what to do next, and realizes that the creature's blood is starting to steam! Perfect!

She finishes the line and the creature shrivels up into a black, pustulent ball. Peppa casts Dispel, and the ball pops (ew), and the characters are propelled up, back through the layers of dreams, and awaken in the storage room.

Petunia casts clairvoyance and looks in on Viveka. She's still asleep, with some black gunk at the corner of her mouth. She shifts in her sleep and wipes it away - the Pioneers have succeeded in killing the Nagayaga, for real this time!

They leave the manor (Dire smashes through a wall and we get the cool freeze-frame as they all leap out), and they go back to Pugmire, victorious.

In the years that follow, each of them goes their separate ways. Their new friend Hobbes von Shadow continues his practice, but with advances in magic that enable long-distance conversations, he is able to move to Houndton and become a trusted advisor of Boomer Pitbull.

Petunia Pibble takes over for Bivi as the head of the Riverwall Pioneer's Guild Storehouse, studying and cataloguing magic items and relics that the adventurers bring back.

Peppa Papillon assumes a higher rank in the Church of Man, but coordinates aid, soup kitchens, and the like - she's never going to be a political leader, but will always lead by example as a Good Dog.

Gelert Sausagedog is realizing that his joints are getting a bit stiff and he can't swashbuckle like he used to. He retires from derring-do, and can often be found at Granny Sue's Roadhouse. He never pays for his own drinks.

And Dazolm Newfoundland founds an orphanage in Riverwall, to take in young pups that might otherwise turn to a life of crime. Years later, when someone arrives asking for "Dire," he calmly says that Dire has been dead for years. But sit and have some soup - if Dazolm can help, he will. 

FIN

Saturday, October 10, 2026

Movie #982: Send Help

Send Help is a horror/comedy directed by Sam Raimi and starring Rachel McAdams, Dylan O'Brien, Edyll Ismail, Xavier Samuel, and Thaneth Warakulnukroh. 

Linda Liddle (McAdams) is capable and diligent in her job in Strategy and Planning at...some company run by Bradley Preston (O'Brien), but she's socially awkward, mousy, and does horrible things like eat tuna at her desk (oh noes! but then, I like tuna). She's passed up for a promotion that Preston gives to his inexperienced, kind of dumb frat buddy (Samuel), but recognizing that he needs her expertise for at least a little while, brings her along on a trip to Thailand to squeeze her for any amount of work he can before shipping her off to a satellite office. 

But then the plane goes down and Linda and Bradley wind up the only survivors, stuck together on a beautiful island with no help coming. As it turns out, Linda is a survivalist and actually auditioned to be on Survivor, so she takes to it like a fish to water (except she eats the fish). Bradley continues being an absolute douchecanoe until it becomes obvious that he will die without Linda, whereupon he tries to manipulate her into teaching him stuff, but remains focused on the utterly impractical plan of building a raft and getting home. 

Everything kind of spirals from there, and here we enter spoiler territory: It turns out that the island isn't uninhabited, there's a house on it belonging to some billionaire and Linda has been visiting the house to get supplies and freshen up. She's still very much a capable survivalist, of course, but she could have arranged their rescue at any time. Oh, and she straight up murders Bradley's fiancée Zuri (Ismail), who'd been searching the islands in the area with a boat captain she hired (Warakulnukroh) by dropping them off a cliff. 

I really like this movie, and I like it all the more because Linda isn't the hero. Yes, she's put upon, underappreciated, passed over, and abused by her boss...but like, she murders two people (possibly three; she claims she allowed her abusive ex-husband to drive drunk and that's how he died, but we have only her word to go on and we know she's capable of both self-delusion and straight-up lying when necessary). There's apparently a lot of debate about who to root for, because if not Linda, then...Bradley? Bradley is a dick in a much more "rich white guy" sense, and it would be easy to think that the worst thing he's ever done is the usual privilege corporate boy's club shit, but then he tries to poison Linda to escape on his stupid raft (that doesn't work). 

Most of the effects are solid; not crazy about the CGI boars, but it's pretty minor. The really goopy stuff - Bradley eating a bug, the blood makeup during the end fight - look really good on screen, and it's really nice to see Raimi getting back to original horror stories (first horror movie he'd done since Drag Me to Hell). 

Michelle pointed out that, plot-wise, it's got a lot in common with The African Queen, and it's amusing to think of a movie like this getting made with Katherine Hepburn in Rachel McAdams' role. 

My Grade: A-
Rewatch Value: Medium-high

Next up: Sinners

Friday, October 9, 2026

Character Creation: Stokerverse

I have crossed oceans of RPGs to find you.

(Which is better than oceans of beef.)

The Game: Stokerverse RPG
The Publisher: Nightfall Games
Degree of Familiarity: I've read Dracula, but otherwise none
Books Required: Just the one


Stokerverse is a Victorian horror game. The gimmick, such as it is, is that it uses Stoker's works (including but not limited to Dracula) as a jumping-off point and that one of the creators is Bram Stoker's great-grandnephew, Dacre Stoker. 

But honestly? That's a pretty good gimmick. The book is well-written, the production values are solid, and I don't hate the system immediately upon reading (I'm also cagey about how much I like systems until I play them, but it looks like a nice balance between a couple of approaches; very much a trad game, but that's fine). 

In fact, the only complaint I have is the rather baffling decision not to have a printable character sheet included with the book. It's the with Quickstart. Which is fine, I guess, but if I'd bought this in a store I'd be hella annoyed. 

Also, not to harp, but the sheet that does exist is kinda garbage. No slot for character's name, name of the game isn't even on it, and the design is just boring. By no means a deal-breaker, but eh.

Anywho, let's make a character! 

Step One is "the conversation," which is basically session 0 kind of stuff, so doesn't really apply here.

Step Two: The Stakes. Can't have a vampire game without stakes! (I'm hilarious.) Let's assume we're doing a standard campaign, so I get 4 Stat Points and 3 Skill Points.

The book says that I can allocate these points at any point during chargen, though to "maintain suspension of disbelief" I should do it before play begins. Not entirely sure what they mean there, but whatever. I'll do it as I go, how about that.

Steps Three and Four: Archetypes. This game has you pick two Archetypes, which I really like (Cairn does something similar). I could pick both, roll both, or do one and one. I feel random today, let's at least roll the first one. "Performer." Cool, I can get behind that. Shall I pick the second one? Nah, let's keep rolling. "Game Warden." Ooh, sure. My character works for a circus. 

(Side note: Yes, I am aware that Victorian circuses probably didn't have the best track record with regard to their treatment of humans or animals, but a) it's a horror game, b) this is just a chargen exercise, and c) who am I even talking to.)

Let's say my character's name is Armitage Kelk. Tall, big mustache, handy with a rifle, runs the animal acts in his circus. In his 60s, kind of avuncular, says things like "what what" a lot. 

It's an act, of course. His real name is John MacHenry, born in Scotland in 1853 (which puts him in his 40s "now", depending on when "now" is in this game). He joined the British Army and for some reason got sent to the Gold Coast just in time for the invasion of Asante in 1874. He was not down for that shit, deserted, and wound up in living with some African auxiliary troops who'd also decided the British army could eat shit. He hooked up with the circus when they sent some folks to collect exotic animals, and here we are! 


Step Five: Record stuff. Which basically means I get to synthesize all of this stuff, I think. Boy, it'd be nice if there were an example of chargen, he said for the umpteenth time. 

Well, putting both Archetypes together, we get: 

STR 1, DEX 2, KNOW 0, CONC 0, CHA 1, COOL 1, LUCK 1

(I think it's weird to have a stat called "Cool" in this game. When did "cool" start getting used to refer to a steady and calm demeanor? Feels anachronistic, but I don't know if it is.)

Anyway, I have 4 points to add to those. I don't have to have a rating in them (that is, they range 0 to 6). I feel like Kelk should have better CHA, since he's maintaining a near-constant charade. COOL, too, maybe should go up. Knowledge can stay at 0, but Concentration I feel like I should raise. I'll put two there, actually. 

Skills! Better just list out what I have.

Athletics 3
Diplomacy 2
Driving (Riding) 2
Education (Criminal) 1
Education (Pick 1 - let's say Trade & Craft) 1
Firearms 2
Fisticuffs 1
Observation 2
Profession (Game Warden) 2
Profession (Performance) 1
Stealth 3
Survival 3
Thievery 1

I note with some amusement that I have most of the skills I'd get as a Soldier, too. That's handy. I get three more points, so I'll put 1 into Profession (Soldier), one into Thievery, and one into Firearms. 

For Traits, I get Ambidextrous (um, sure?), Attractive, Contacts, Expanded Wardrobe, Good Vision, Poor Accommodation (Shack). 

Actually, that's a question. Suppose I had Game Warden and Aristocrat. One has Poor Accommodation and one has Accommodation (Grand Country Estate). Does the better one just win out? I guess it must. 

Well, whatever, my shack is the only accommodation I have and honestly for a circus performer that's about right. I think Kelk's Contact should be Military, someone from his past that knows who he really is but isn't going to tell because Kelk saved his life (if he hadn't intervened, that woman with the sharpened bit of guava might have seriously...). 

And that's actually it! I get a rifle or shotgun (rifle, please, military issue), a survival kit, a folding knife, and performing clothes. 

I think Kelk would be an interesting character in this sort of game, particularly if you had some malevolent force spooking the animals or followed up on the "wolves escaped from the zoo" plotline that gets mentioned in the book. 

Wednesday, October 7, 2026

Character Creation: Fiendgazer

Someone who gazes at fiends? Yes, actually.

The Game: Fiendgazer
The Publisher: Tremor Pings
Degree of Familiarity: None
Books Required: Just the one


Fiendgazer shares some characteristics with Brindlewood Bay (beyond the system, I mean). It's set in a particular locale (Harrowplow, PA), it's a story of creeping supernatural dread and solving mysteries, but it's much more horror-forward. To wit, all the PCs (the titular Fiendgazers, or just Gazers if you're pressed for time) have some awareness of the Fiend ripping into our reality, and can gather Clues to figure out the truth and try to stop it. 

I actually think this game would be really cool to play, though I rather wish instead of giving us an example character for each of the Roles it would have given us an example of play. Like, we're supposed to get a Mark (which is a "narrative token") from each other player, including the GM. Here's where an example of chargen would have been really nice, because I'd love to see the giving of Marks in practice. There are example PCs, sure, but they don't have Marks, just backstories. 

But regardless, let's make a Gazer!

The first thing I do (though I do note that there's no real step-by-step for chargen, which I also find annoying) is decide what the Event was that made my character see beyond. I start with a Gaze stat of -2 (if it goes over 3, I'm consumed by the Rift and no longer a PC), which means I have some awareness of what's going on. Why? Well, I think I'll go to The Weird and roll on "Weird PC Backgrounds," seems pretty appropriate. "You've owned a puzzle box for years, but never been able to open it." Well, that's goddamn perfect. Let's say my character - whom we'll call Dane Zamora - has owned the puzzle box since he was a kid. 

You know, I keep thinking that name sounds self-chosen, so let's say Dane is a trans man, and couldn't open the box at all until he transitioned and chose a new name. That isn't to say trans men are more predisposed towards cthonic magic (I have read no studies on the subject), just that before he did that, perhaps he wasn't authentically him enough to get it working. Anyway, he hasn't managed to open the box all the way, but just a bit, and that was enough to give him the Gaze. 

Next up, jorb. My Job gives me four stats (and I really don't agree with some of them; like, why on Earth does Salesperson not have the Social trait?) and a special move. I think Dane is young, probably only 20 or so, so let's say he's a Staffer (he works at a drugstore in Harrowplow). The write-up for Staffer asks me to consider "what dream do you sink into to keep your sanity?" 

In Dane's case, I think it's that his boss, Sally, just shuts the fuck up. Like, he doesn't wish death or ruin upon her, just that she were struck dumb and couldn't ask Dane stupid questions or give him busywork anymore. 

As a Staffer, I get the traits Deep, Handy, Lore, and Network. I get to pick one of these to have a +2, one gets a +1, the others get 0 (but I still have them; everything else gets -1). Well, I think Dane should have Handy at +2 (it'll be a stretch to play, but it'd be fun), Deep +1, and that leaves the other two at 0. And then my special move is that once per game, I can appear harmless and negligible, and no one notices me until I act. 

And that's it, kids, because everything else would require a group. I think Dane wears loose-fitting shirts and pants (the shirts are to hide that he binds, the pants are just what he finds comfy). He's got a wallet on a chain, sturdy work boots, and a kind of Elliot Page haircut, though darker complexion (I think he's of Mexican extraction). Since he's opened that box, he finds himself fiddling with it without realizing it (it's small enough to fit in his pockets).