Saturday, March 29, 2025

Thirsty Sword Lesbians: Escape from the Garden

Last night was, well, you can see the title line. Here's last time. On we go!

Three of our heroes are still in the Hidden Garden, and not entirely sure how to get out. They head down a path, down some mossy stone steps into a valley, to a stone cottage. An old man sits outside on a chair, leaning on his cane - this must be the fellow they were told knows how to get out.

Esme talks to him, but talking to him is a difficult endeavor, as he seems to answer questions that haven't been asked yet or have conversations other than the one he's presently engaged in. She does get his name (Levi). He also seems to see Cleo as a cat even when she's in human form, tossing her a bit of food and making "pspspsps" noises at her. 

He does eventually tell them, though, that there are three ways out of the Garden: The Sad Way, the Dangerous Way, and the Worst Way. The Dangerous Way involves following instructions in "the book," and from context they figure it involves making or cooking something. The Sad Way is clearly the most expedient, as it involves cutting oneself off from feeling (since getting into the Garden requires acknowledging one's feelings). The Worst Way is less clear; Levi says that the Garden is "all stacked up together," and the Worst Way involves "taking that apart."

The characters decide that the Worst Way is probably not a method they want to pursue. They talk about the Dangerous Way, but when they mention Hedera, Levi says something about her being captured. Maybe the Sad Way is better, because it's faster? Izzy worries about Hedera, since she's probably not safe on her own, and freaks out a bit about all of this. Esme tries to lend her emotional support, but Izzy won't open up, and Esme steps away. She numbs herself to feeling, and fades out of the Garden. Izzy and Cleo just kind of blink.  

Meanwhile, Hedera, whom you'll recall left the Garden on her own, is facing off against Tranquility and her Lunar Loyalists. Hedera insults her, calling her out as a poor leader, and Tranquility smiles and nods to her people. They toss something onto the grass, which immediately blackens and dies! Furious, Hedera lashes out, but Tranquility dodges and nicks her with her silver blade. Hedera calls up water, but Tranquility flips upwards (using her gauntlets to control gravity) and stabs Helix with her sword!

Helix is unharmed (he's a bloptopus, he doesn't really have organs to puncture), but Tranquility flips him off Hedera's shoulder and into the crowd of Loyalists. Hedera tries to call her out again, and Tranquility orders a couple of her lieutenants in powered armor to capture Hedera. Hedera realizes to her horror that although she can't their faces (they're wearing opaque visors), one of them is Vi - she recognizes the tattoos.

Hedera calls up another deluge and shoves the lieutenants aside, and sprays Tranquility with more water. Tranquility spins out of the way, but Hedera winds up stealing her crown (the Loyalists gasp). She orders Hedera to stand down, and Hedera glances over and sees Vi lift her helmet and mouth "please."

Hedera walks over to Vi, kneels, and hands over the crown. "I surrender to you," she says, realizes she's in love (which happens to be one of her trials as the Nature Witch). Hedera is clapped in handcuffs, and Vi shows her that Helix is safe.

Some time later, Esme appears. She sees the dead grass and the burn marks from where ships took off, but no sign of Hedera. She sees the woman who drives the pig sty-mobile nearby, and curtly asks where the ships went. The woman points her in a direction - they flew up a ways, and then disappeared. Esme moves along, tracking the ships' movements.

Back in the Garden, Izzy and Cleo try to figure out what to do next. Izzy knows that she could numb herself to get out, and figures Cleo out to learn what she loves most, but what she loves most is just being a cat, so that's not something she can really give up. Izzy doesn't think she's really able to take the Sad Way, so she asks Levi for the book. 

He gives it to them, and Izzy and Cleo spend some montage time gathering the things they need until they've created a psychedelic mixture. They both take it, and fade out of the Garden. As they reappear on Kieron, though, Izzy realizes she can hear emotions. Cleo is feeling great, and her emotions are melodious and symphonic. Cleo also gets poured out of the Garden like a sloppy liquid, and can stand up as a solid person but her limbs are all bendy. Izzy is...not best pleased.

Esme is nearby, and can hear the gentle hum of ship engines - she figures they must be cloaked. Izzy and Cleo spot her just as the ship's door opens. Lunar Loyalists demand the newlyweds, and Esme responds by letting her hair down, leaping into the ship, and kicking ass.

Izzy leaps up and joins her, unsheathing her pink rose quartz sword. She gets tackled by three Loyalists and pinned to a wall, but Esme dispatches them with cool efficiency. Cleo oozes up onto the ship, as well, and Izzy finds a bucket to keep her in. Izzy also realizes that she can hear the tinny, unpleasant music of fear from the Loyalists, but nothing from Esme.

The PA kicks on, and Tranquility demands the newlyweds. Esme demands Hedera, but Tranquility refuses. Esme offers herself in exchange for Hedera, and Tranquility accepts, telling her to enter the elevator at the end of the corridor. 

Izzy tries to entice Esme to stay, but fails - Esme is still numb. She enters the elevator (unaware that Cleo has also done so by flowing along the floor in a long string), and Izzy is once again left alone.

Elsewhere on the ship, Hedera finds herself in a tank of water, treated with some kind of chemical weakening her. She calls on her power over water, though, to dilute the water until the tank starts to crack...

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